Mini-Ep 486: Burrito Moments and More
Elise has a moment of joy after a morning of exercise and Doree reports on a meetup with Kate! They hear from listeners about their current microjoys, a helpful insight from a listener who moved abroad as a kid, and lots of tips for beginner gardeners!
Mentioned in this Episode
free classes from your local University extension Master Gardener program
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Transcript
This episode transcript is AI generated.
Doree Shafrir (00:10):
Hello and welcome to Forever35, a podcast about the things we do to take care of ourselves. I'm Doree Shafrir.
Elise Hu (00:16):
And I'm Elise Hu and we're just two friends who like to talk a lot about serums.
Doree Shafrir (00:20):
And this is a mini episode where we hear from you, we share your comments and your thoughts, and we answer your questions to the best of our ability. But please remember, we are podcast hosts, we are not experts. We always encourage you to seek support first and foremost from a medical and/or mental health professional as needed.
Elise Hu (00:37):
And it looks like at least from a cursory look that we have a lot of questions and voice memos and things
Doree Shafrir (00:44):
This
Elise Hu (00:44):
Week. We
Doree Shafrir (00:44):
Do. We do. So thank you so much for writing in. We have a lot of gardening tips. We actually have one about micro joys, and I just wanted to check in with you, Elise, to see if you have any micro joys these days.
Elise Hu (00:59):
Yeah. I mean, I have one from today because- What?
(01:03):
It brings me great joy to report that I ran a few miles and I went straight from running a few miles to a Pilates class, which wasn't too hard. It wasn't the kind where I'm hurting and shaking and sweating through my shirt. It was just like a pretty moderate one. And then afterwards, I was only a block away from a great breakfast burrito. So then I enjoyed my breakfast burrito by myself. Nobody's in the house. I just had a quiet breakfast burrito after a few hours of exercise. I think I maybe scrolled my phone. It was excellent. So it's that post-workout meal that
Doree Shafrir (01:46):
I am- I love that.
Elise Hu (01:47):
... considering my micro joy. And then one other one from yesterday afternoon. I don't have any sisters. I just have a younger brother, Roger Hugh. Shout out. Roger Hugh, what's up? And I love him and we have a great sibling relationship, but he's a boy. And so I always wondered what it would be like to have a sister just because sisters seem to have a special sisterly bond, or many of them do. Others don't. Others are less close. But the closest person I have to a sister is this gal who's nearly a decade younger than me. I think she's about nine years younger than me. And we worked together at NPR, which was her first job out of school. And her name's Kat. She's also an author. And now she's teaching at Columbia in New York.
(02:37):
Oh, cool. And the micro joy I'm reporting is that out of the blue, she FaceTime called me yesterday, yesterday afternoon, as I was just finishing a book that I had a lot of feelings about. And all of a sudden I see her on the screen. I was just really happy to see her face and get to talk about books with her. She's a big reader. And then she showed me her office. She gave me a little video tour of her office, which looks out onto that lawn where the building that the students took over is. And I was like, oh yes.
Doree Shafrir (03:07):
Oh, wow.
Elise Hu (03:08):
I know that building from the news.
Doree Shafrir (03:11):
Yep.
Elise Hu (03:12):
Anyway, so just receiving a nice random afternoon call from a friend who feels like the closest thing I have to a sister. Such a treat and warmed my heart. I love that. Yeah, I have a few. Yeah. It's been a nice week. We had a great event earlier this week that I was rushing around for, but pulled off an event at the Lighthouse where I work often with Oscar, the dog, and it went off without any technical hitches and there was a great turnout and the snacks were awesome and the vibes were good. That's great. It's been
Doree Shafrir (03:48):
A good
Elise Hu (03:49):
Week. Just very eventful. And I have a lot to be very grateful for. What about you? Have you-
Doree Shafrir (03:57):
That's so cool.
Elise Hu (03:58):
Did you have a moment in front of a burrito where you felt quite gratified?
Doree Shafrir (04:04):
I did not have a burrito moment, no.
Elise Hu (04:08):
A burrito moment. Yes.
Doree Shafrir (04:09):
We're
Elise Hu (04:09):
Changing the nomenclature. It is now
Doree Shafrir (04:11):
Called
Elise Hu (04:12):
A burrito moment.
Doree Shafrir (04:13):
It's now a burrito moment. I did have lunch with Kate Spencer.
Elise Hu (04:19):
Oh, yay. Oh, report in. Please debrief us.
Doree Shafrir (04:23):
Yeah. It was just really nice to catch up with her. I used to see her multiple times a week on video and now we text all the time, but we don't see each other all the time. And I do feel like it takes conscious effort to be like, we need to make a plan to see each other. And she's busy and I'm busy. And so
Elise Hu (04:46):
We
Doree Shafrir (04:46):
Made this lunch plan. What can
Elise Hu (04:47):
You update us with? I know it's her life and her stories, but
Doree Shafrir (04:51):
Can you do
Elise Hu (04:51):
Any broad stroke updates?
Doree Shafrir (04:53):
I mean, she's doing really well. She's happy. She's working on some stuff. And yeah, she's just ... We both got the avocado toast.
Elise Hu (05:03):
Okay.
Doree Shafrir (05:05):
I got mine with poached eggs. She did not get poached eggs, but poached eggs were really good. They were really well poached,
Elise Hu (05:11):
Perfectly
Doree Shafrir (05:12):
Poached.
Elise Hu (05:13):
I
Doree Shafrir (05:13):
Enjoy poaching. She got an Arnold, I can never say this, Arnold Palmer. And then as we were leaving, we ran into another friend of ours, another mutual friend who was also at the same place having lunch with someone else.
Elise Hu (05:25):
Yeah. It's crazy how small town Los Angeles can feel.
Doree Shafrir (05:29):
Yes. It was very good. If you've been around for a little bit. We went to this place called the Clark Street Diner, that's what it's called. And it used to be the 101 Coffee Shop, which was like an iconic Hollywood diner for years and years. And we used to meet there all the time and write and just catch up. And neither of us had been there since COVID. Wow. And then it closed and then reopened as the Clark Street diner. So we decided to meet there just sort of like for nostalgia's sake. And it looked exactly the same. I don't think they changed one thing. The menu was smaller. They didn't have as many things on the menu, but it was just nice to be there again, although it was very loud. I found myself having to shout. So that was a micro joy, just kind of along the same lines as yours.
(06:26):
Reconnecting with friends is like such a blessing. Another thing that has been kind of a micro joy for me is I've talked on a couple other episodes about how I'm cleaning out my office, I'm decluttering. And so I'm like unearthing a lot of stuff.
Elise Hu (06:42):
Oh, what have you unearthed that you're excited about?
Doree Shafrir (06:45):
I unearthed a notepad. Can you see what this says?
Elise Hu (06:49):
From my desk at The Wing. Oh, RIP. Wow, that's a blast
Doree Shafrir (06:55):
From the
Elise Hu (06:56):
Past.
Doree Shafrir (06:57):
So I don't know. I know they once had Kate and me at their wing camp. And this might have been from there or it might have been from something else, but it's this notepad that says from my desk at the Wing, which was a coworking space that no longer exists that was problematic in some ways, but also in some ways really great. And I do miss the actual space itself. So I texted a picture of the notepad to an old friend in New York and she was like, "Oh my God," because she used to work there. And so she was like, "Wow." So it's been kind of fun to find these random artifacts just in my office. So yeah.
Elise Hu (07:44):
That's great.
Doree Shafrir (07:45):
Yeah. And now we will get to a voicemail about micro joys.
Listener Voicemail (07:52):
Hi, Doree and Elise. This is Elizabeth in Decatur, Georgia. And I am at a red light voice memoing you in the car because I just saw a woman cross the street in front of my car getting into her car with an open mug. She also was wearing a very large, very fuzzy brown coat that made her look like a teddy bear. And she had a where the wild things are tote bag and I loved her and it made me think of you and gave me a little micro moment of joy. Love that.
Elise Hu (08:31):
That's a woman after my own heart. I'm really living on the edge with my free mugging these days because I'm not only free mugging or I'm not free mugging. I am free stemless wine glassing. There is no wine in it, so I'm not drinking and driving, but a stemless wine glass doesn't fit in a cup holder. No,
Doree Shafrir (08:53):
It does not. So
Elise Hu (08:54):
It sort of balances precariously a top the cup holder and we just have to hope for the best. I'm living on the edge, folks, living on the edge. I know Doree's like, "This is not my bag."
Doree Shafrir (09:08):
That really stresses me out, not going to lie. Wow. All right. And before we take a break, we got this sweet note, "Hi, L and door." I wanted to share this with you because I'm a little nervous to tell my friends and I know you'll get it. As I'm approaching 40, I realized I had great pieces and was buying more thoughtfully, but my closet still felt cluttered and overwhelming. I wasn't actually wearing most of what I owned. I hired a stylist for a day and it was honestly transformative. She helped me edit everything. We literally evaluated every single piece of clothing I owned. We filled a few huge donation bags and she styled multiple outfits that I can now reference. Now my closet is organized. I can see everything and it genuinely feels like a store I want to shop in. I love getting dressed again and I can already tell it's going to help me stop over shopping.
(10:01):
She was so kind and affirming and it truly felt like the best 40th birthday gift I could give myself highly recommend. I
Elise Hu (10:07):
Think that's such a genius idea because so often when we engage with a stylist or a shopper, they're to buy new things where I think a stylist could be really useful if they just shopped my closet for me and helped me put together outfits without buying anything new, like nothing acquisitive.
Doree Shafrir (10:26):
And so
Elise Hu (10:26):
If there were a stylist nearby that could do that, I feel like that would be totally worth it. And it's like you have all these new clothes or new outfits from what you already own, which gives new life to all these things that were just sitting around in the closet, collecting dust. And often, I don't know about y'all, but I forget that I have certain items until I see something on somebody else and I'm like, "Oh, that's a really nice off-white cardigan." And then I think to myself, "Oh wait, I have it or I have one just like it and I just never wear it. " So I feel that way about trousers a lot because I don't have a good trouser organizing system and so I don't think to pull them out to make looks, which I need to.
Doree Shafrir (11:14):
I also feel like with no disrespect to stylists who are amazing and do great work and deserve every penny that they earn, I also feel like if you have a trusted friend, this could be something that they help you with if they have time and maybe you could do it reciprocally, like you could do it for them. That's a good idea. That's a good idea. Because sometimes you just need that other person. And it's great to have a stylist, of course, but if you can't afford a stylist or one's not available, maybe you just have a friend come over and help you. Yeah. All right. Just before we take a break, reminder that you can call or text us at 781-591-0390 and email us at forever35podcast@gmail.com. Our website is forever35podcast.com. We have links there to everything we mention on the show. You can follow us on Instagram @forever35podcast.
(12:10):
You can join our Patreon at patreon.com/fore35. At the free level, you get access to the semi-monthly newsletter. At $5 a month, you get access to our casual chat, which is now on video. We do live casual chats every quarter. We're doing one next Wednesday, April 8th at 1:30 PM Pacific, 4:30 PM Eastern. So join us for that. And at $10 a month, you get ad free episodes and a shout out on the podcast every month. You can also shop our favorite products at shopmy.us/forever35. And after the break, we have a voicemail about living abroad in response to a listener question from a week or two ago and a bunch of other stuff. So stay tuned.
Elise Hu (12:51):
We'll be right back.
Doree Shafrir (12:52):
We'll be right back. All right, we are back and here is a voicemail about living abroad.
Listener Voicemail (13:07):
Hey ladies, this is Mara Paisel. I'm calling in from Santa Barbara, California. And I just wanted to respond to the caller who was thinking about moving internationally with her whole family. And as a kid who was moved without ... It was just my mom and I, we moved to Istanbul, Turkey in August. That September was September 11th, and we were two women alone in a Muslim country. When all of that was going down, our family in the States and friends in the states were saying, "Come back, come back, come back." And no, it was an amazing experience. I was in eighth grade to address the patriotism aspect of it, we felt like we were representing the positive side of Americans in Turkey and that we did not agree with everything that unraveled after the fact. So yeah, I think all I can say is just go for it, absolutely.
(14:31):
As an eighth grader there, it was one of the most difficult years of my life. I was the only American in an all Turkish school, and I would not ever change it for anything. I learned so much about the world. And to this day, as a 38 year old, I identify as more of a citizen of the world rather than a citizen of the US. Also, just remember, nothing has to be forever. You can rent out your house rather than sell it. You can always come back. You can always undo. I mean, they say you can never go home, but you can always just head home and share your adventure with your friends.
Doree Shafrir (15:18):
Yeah. I love this perspective. Also, what an experience in retrospect have just moved abroad when nine eleven happened.
Elise Hu (15:29):
Yeah. Yeah. And to a Muslim country too, when the Bush administration was stirring up all that anti-Muslim
Doree Shafrir (15:36):
Stuff. Yes. Yes.
Elise Hu (15:39):
Thank you. I
Doree Shafrir (15:40):
Agree. Just go for
Elise Hu (15:41):
It.
Doree Shafrir (15:41):
Now on a totally different note, we have a voicemail about requesting silence during beauty treatments.
Listener Voicemail (15:52):
Hey, Doree and Elise. The latest mini episode where you've talked about whether or not you want silence during a massage made me think of this idea and solution that I have, and I want somebody to steal it. So when you get in an Uber comfort, it asks you a couple questions that says, "Do you want conversation or do you want it silent?"
Doree Shafrir (16:12):
Something
Listener Voicemail (16:12):
Like that. And it says, "Do you want it cold or warm?" I really wish that when you went and got your haircut, it asked you similar questions. And when you went and got a massage, it asked similar questions because it is so ... I dread getting my hair cut and highlighted because it takes like three hours and if I have to talk during that three hours, I leave there emotionally drained. I dread it, but I'm kind of anxious about the confrontation of saying I don't want to talk. So anyway, and actually I mentioned the suggestion to my hairstylist, not because I didn't want to talk to her, but because I had just taken an Uber of comfort and I was like, "Wouldn't that work so well with hairstylists?" And she got to offend it. She was like, "Oh, you don't want to talk to me.
(17:04):
" So anyway, which kind of just ... Actually, I was okay talking with her and it kind of proves my point that wouldn't it be great if you could just be like silence preferred and whenever I get a massage, they always have the heat on the table and I hate that. I run hot anyway, so I wish I could just write cool table silence preferred. That'd be so lovely. So I wish somebody would feel that.
Elise Hu (17:28):
Great idea. Why don't we do that?
Doree Shafrir (17:30):
Yeah. I mean, I get it. People feel awkward about making these requests. I think especially if you've been going to someone for a while and they've always talked and suddenly ... And you're just like, "I don't really want to talk." Yeah, exactly. There should be some sort of token or something that you can put on the door or something. It's like in yoga class, they always said if you don't want adjustments, there was something to ... I haven't been to a group yoga class in a really long time, but there was always something you could do to indicate that you didn't want the teacher touching you. So it's sort of a similar kind of thing. All right. Last voicemail in this segment, someone is traveling to our area and would like some tips.
Elise Hu (18:20):
Oh, okay.
Doree Shafrir (18:21):
Yeah. So this is kind of a fun one.
Listener Voicemail (18:24):
We would love recommendations for going to the Orange County and LA area as a family. My older kids really want the spring break trip to be as Hollywood and probably all the TikTok trends as possible. Probably a lot of the things that Elise's oldest daughter is into. My older kids would love to do, but we also are going to have to be somewhat essential to Tustin California for a couple of days because of this baseball clinic. But we really am a little bit wary of the Orange County MAGA vibes and would really love some recommendations for Orange County and where to stay or what to do. And even just like what it's like from driving from LAX to that area at night on a Friday, maybe we should just be staying in Santa Monica or something for a couple nights and then transitioning. I don't know.
(19:19):
And then when we transition to Hollywood area, we do like Malibu or where are the areas that families would stay easily and what would families do to spread of kids? What are some not to be missed adventures, sites, all the celeb stuff, whatever, but also good food and hidden gems, any and all wisdom would be welcome.
Elise Hu (19:43):
My big tip is to not try and cross to different parts of town within one day. So if you're going to be in the Southern California area and you're going to do like a beach day, just stay on the beach or around the beach. And then if you're going to do like studio tour, pick one studio to do the tour. And if you're in that area, whether it's Paramount or Warner Brothers, or if you're in Culver City and you do Sony, just stay in that place where the studio is. So if you want to do a Hollywood thing, I totally recommend doing a studio tour, but you should do it based on what shows your kids are into. Ava's really into Gilmore Girls, and so it made sense to go to Warner Brothers, but then if you have kids like the boys, Rob's boys, they are really into Breaking Bad.
(20:33):
And so they have like breaking bad stuff at Sony and they have some Seinfeld stuff at Sony. And so it's kind of just do some research about which studio thing you want to do. That's always fun. That's like a special Universal Studios is great too because then Universal Studio Studio Tour has the rides and I really enjoy ... There's three different rides that are part of the Universal Studio Studio Tour. But the overall tip for Los Angeles is like when you pick a place for the day, stay in that place, like that part of town, because Los Angeles is less a city than a federation of neighborhoods. And so when you pick your neighborhood, stay in that neighborhood. And I really love doing the standup paddle boarding and the kayaking with the kids. If you're doing a beach day, you could also do a surf lesson if you're down in Manhattan Beach.
(21:21):
Well, all the beaches have served lessons, but that's really fun. I'm a huge foodie. A great place to really foodie out is Koreatown. And it's not just Korean food that's really great in Koreatown. There's also like really good Oaxacan food in Koreatown. There's really good Taiwanese food in Koreatown. And so you can always message us or chat us on the Patreon if you want more specific examples. But the other tween things that I would mention are The Grove, obviously, The Grove, the outdoor mall development, and there's the Grove Farmer's Market and you can do kind of a mid-cities day there. The other thing, if you're at The Grove is very nearby is the Academy Museum, which is the museum that the Oscars Academy. And that is a really cool museum that goes into movie history. So there's a section for costuming and a section for screenwriting and they always have cool exhibits.
(22:17):
I remember going to a Miyazaki exhibit and they have like such cool film artifacts. I'm just trying to think of like Hollywoody things that aren't being on Hollywood Boulevard. But of course,
Doree Shafrir (22:26):
If you want
Elise Hu (22:26):
To go see the Walk of Fame and see the Dolby Theater where they actually do, and the Egyptian Theater and the Chinese Theater, those are all on Hollywood Boulevard and those are worth singing. You can do like the hop on and hop off bus there. But there's like great food all over Los Angeles. It's hard. It's like such a smorgasbord. So it's hard to be very specific, but I would say you can't really go wrong in K-Town.
Doree Shafrir (22:53):
I agree with everything Elise is saying. And the other thing that I do just want to like note, you said something about like, and I'm paraphrasing, but it was kind of like, I'm hesitant about the OC because of MAGA vibes. And there is like a small contingent of people in Huntington Beach specifically that have been known for being kind of MAGA, but Orange County as a whole is a huge diverse place. There are not MAGA vibes in all of Orange County.
Elise Hu (23:26):
Right,
Doree Shafrir (23:26):
Right, right.
Elise Hu (23:27):
It's
Doree Shafrir (23:27):
Not a monolithic
Elise Hu (23:28):
Place.
Doree Shafrir (23:28):
Yeah. No, not at all. And I want you to like get that out of your head as you go to Orange County. I mean, and within Orange County, there's also Laguna Beach, which is just gorgeous. You can go to the beach there. There's just like really cool stuff. There's like a lot of great food in Orange County also. So I wouldn't go in to that part of the trip hesitantly at all. That's all. Perfect. All right. I hope that was helpful. We are going to take another short break and when we come back, we have some gardening tips.
Elise Hu (24:10):
Yay. We'll be right back.
Doree Shafrir (24:11):
We'll be right back. All right, we are back. A lot of people recommended going to your local library and seeing what resources they have, whether it's like gardening, gardening classes or just information. So that is just like a tip. And this is a text from a listener. Advice, start slow so you don't get overwhelmed. Just start with one of the garden beds. Ideally the one that gets the most sun, top it up with good compost, and grow things that will make you excited, whether it's your favorite vegetable or herbs or favorite flour, assuming that they grow in your area. If you go all in, you can bring yourself out and it's also expensive. Some recommended sources, free classes from your local university extension master gardener program. What? Did you know that this is a thing? No. Me neither. Which will be locally based and epic gardening on Instagram and YouTube.
(25:14):
Also, Joe Gardner, YouTube videos and podcasts. So calming and informative. Good luck.
Elise Hu (25:21):
Okay. I actually need to take some of these tips myself, so thank
Doree Shafrir (25:26):
You. Elise, do you want to read this next one that's gardening tips for beginners?
Elise Hu (25:31):
Okay. Gardening tips for beginners. I live in Eastern Washington and I am an avid gardener. The climate on Western Washington is much different than here. I recommend cabbage, broccoli, lettuces, and berries. Berries are also a perennial and will come back year after year. Also, seek out your local master gardener clubs. They often have no/low cost education programs to get people started, as well as plant start sales to help support their work.
Doree Shafrir (25:58):
So cool. Okay. And someone else was saying, "I have Seattle garden advice." Local farmer's markets usually have ask a master gardener booth staffed by University of Washington experts.
Elise Hu (26:13):
Wow.
Doree Shafrir (26:13):
Wow. Pacific Northwest is like a gardening paradise. They're kind and gentle and extremely wise. Highly recommend. Also, the PNW Gardening Subreddit has taught me a ton, which mostly boils down to everything grows here, so just try it. Also, everything grows here. So every invasive plant goes buck wild. Buy a hoory, hoory knife and have fun.
Elise Hu (26:40):
I need to go to an master gardener because what I really feel I need is kind of a plant doctor or a plant Rx. Somebody where I can show them my situation and they can immediately tell me, "Oh, it's that this is getting too much sun or you haven't fertilized, or how often are you fertilizing? How often are you watering? How much are you watering?" I would like a place to take my plant as if
Doree Shafrir (27:04):
I would
Elise Hu (27:04):
Take my body to the doctor.
Doree Shafrir (27:06):
Yes. I actually, I have not looked into this at all, but that also seems like something that could happen on Reddit. I feel like people on Reddit love diagnosing, whether it's a plant or a person. So I feel like if you sent pictures and you were like, "Here's what's happening." You would get a bunch of people being like, "Here's what's happening." So that could be something you try. Maybe I'll try
Elise Hu (27:29):
That. Yeah. I really have
Doree Shafrir (27:30):
To be
Elise Hu (27:30):
Vulnerable though because on Reddit, I'm Elise Hu.
Doree Shafrir (27:35):
You can start a second account and just toggle
Elise Hu (27:38):
Being- Like a little between account.
Doree Shafrir (27:39):
Yeah, you can toggle between them and just have it be anonymous.
Elise Hu (27:42):
I didn't realize that everybody had monikers. I know.
Doree Shafrir (27:45):
I know. Well, I have one that's basically my name because I've done AMAs as an author. And then I was like, "I just want to ask about tennis stuff." So I started a separate account. Okay. Someone else said, "I agree with Elise that herbs are a great way to start. Also, maybe pick just a couple veggies, berries, or fruits that you really like and start with those rather than trying to do a wide variety. Snap peas, beans, tomatoes, zucchini/squash. Lettuces are a few that are very easy. And of course, a few of your favorite maybe native flowers. Enjoy."
Elise Hu (28:20):
Okay.
Doree Shafrir (28:21):
Wow. Wealth of information here. Thank you everybody. Yeah. All right. That brings us to the end of our show. Thank you all so much for listening. Please continue writing and calling in and we will talk to you soon. Take care.
Elise Hu (28:35):
Talk to you next time.
Doree Shafrir (28:36):
Bye.