Mini-Ep 287: Eggplant & Horse Head & Bath
Kate wonders if she should immortalize the eggplant emoji on her body and Doree enjoys the most Doree-like show on Netflix with her mom. Then, listeners send in an eczema product that hasn’t been suggested before, wonder about the sticky world of self-tanner, and commiserate with Kate about judging yourself when learning a new skill.
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Transcript
Kate: Hello, and welcome to forever35, a podcast about the things we do to take care of ourselves. I'm Kate Spencer,
Doree: And I am Doree Shafrir.
Kate: And you know what? We're not experts.
Doree: You know, Kate, we are not experts contr contrary
Doree: To Popular Belief
Kate: contrary to what all the folks are saying out there. You and I Nope, not experts.
Doree: No, but we are two friends who like to talk a lot about serums. We
Kate: Do. And this is a mini episode of our podcast, where we hear from you. We share your comments and your thoughts, and we're gonna answer your questions to the best of our ability.
Doree: And again, we are not experts. We're podcast hosts, and we always encourage you to seek support first and foremost, from a medical and or mental health professional as needed.
Kate: Indeed, we do Doree, but if you'd like to reach us, our voicemail member is 7 8 1 5 9 1 0 3 9 0. You can text us too. We just got a text today that referenced, uh, last week's mini episode, they just said big clock. And then three eggplant emojis. And I was like, wow, this person just get, they get us. That's like you and me in a nutshell, you know, you can also email us at forever35podcast@gmail.com. We love to hear from you.
Doree: We really do, and you can visit our website forever35podcast.com for links to everything we mentioned on the show. We are on Twitter at forever35pod don't tweet very often. I'd say almost never. Yeah, but we do post to instagram forever35podcast and do have a very active facebook group at facebook.com/groups/forever35podcast. The password is serums. And just a reminder, you can sign up for our newsletter at foreverfivepodcast.com/newsletter.
Kate: Mm. Now I saw you in person a few days ago and I just need to tell the audience. So Dory's hair looks amazing.
Doree: Oh, Well thank you!
Kate: Like it was, I, I was, it was at my, it was at my book signing and I was, I had had a really crazy day. I almost forgot my eggplant stamp. My eggplant emoji stamp. Oh my gosh. I had this like panic attack right before my Uber was arriving, looking for this freaking stamp. And I was like, these listeners are coming. I've talked about this goddamn stamp and now I've lost it two minutes before I'm Supposed to leave.
Doree: Oh No!
Kate: the most Kate Spencer thing I've ever done anyway, fast forward to the very lovely event, which was so many nice for forever 35 listeners were there as well as SAMO and Doha for, and I mean, look, you both looked fantastic, but I just, I, we
Doree: Got to sit together. It was
Kate: So great. I was so excited to see you both, but in the moment I was like, registering how good your hair looked, but it like my brain wires weren't working. And then after you, I texted you because it looks so good.
Doree: So, oh my gosh.
Kate: Stylish and
Doree: Wow.
Kate: It looks really good. I just wanna say, I feel like the bangs were a great decision.
Doree: Wow. The
Kate: Lob, I think that's what you would call your length.
Doree: Yeah, I think a lo yep.
Kate: Yeah. So I, I just wanna say like kudos, kudos to your hair.
Doree: Wow. Kudos to your hair.
Kate: I give your hair kudos.
Doree: Oh my goodness. Well, Kate, you know what? I really appreciate that. Um, yeah, but thank you. Thank you so much. Um, your book event was really fun. Really fun. It, it
Kate: Was, it was fun. I was, I was really touched that people came out. It was really cool.
Doree: Yeah. Um, but we should also tell people that you have another event tonight.
Kate: Yeah. And you know, I've got a great partner at this event. You'll be able to get, get, to see those bangs in action. Everybody, because Dory and I are doing a live virtual book launch celebration, which basically means we're just gonna be Gavin and answering questions for about an hour.
Doree: Yep. Yep. That's
Kate: That's true. If you would like to join us, it is not too late. I don't think anyway, I listen. I'm just gonna tell you about it here. Hopefully you can join us. Uh there's it's today, Friday, March 18th at 8:00 PM. Eastern 5:00 PM. Spec, wait, I almost just said 5:00 PM specific. Oh boy. 5:00 PM. Pacific. Oh. And uh, there is a link to register in the show. Notes is for, if you've bought my book, please join us or requested it from your library. Just, you know, any of it. You're you're we would love to have you there.
Doree: I'm excited for this.
Kate: I am too,
Doree: Because am not, it's not like it's not so much like an interview.
Kate: No, it's literally just like shooting the shit, being
Doree: Like hangout. Yeah.
Kate: Yes. In fact, it's like very loosely structured.
Doree: Very,
Kate: Which is kind of what I'm into. I might bring some like fun questions for us to answer. Oh
Doree: My gosh. I thought you were gonna say, I might bring some fun props. And I was like, okay,
Kate: I'm gonna show up with my top hat.
Doree: Yeah. Like
Kate: My trunk full of props. I mean, I'm not bringing props.
Doree: Okay. All right. Well maybe I'll bring props,
Kate: Maybe pros. I might bring some pros to, oh,
Doree: Should we bring pros?
Kate: You know, that might be fun to kind of like kick it old school and bring some pros.
Doree: Yeah. Remember when we used to do high, low.
Kate: Yeah. I still think in terms of high and low when I try things. So maybe we need to rev. Should we revive high? I, I do have some high, low candle talk to do.
Doree: Maybe, maybe for one night only
Kate: We revive our high and low.
Doree: Yeah. What do you think special thing for your book event? Huh? Okay.
Kate: Do you have one?
Doree: No, not off the top of my head, but I can come up with one.
Kate: I mean, I've been obsessively testing out mint smelling candles. So I have a variety of things to talk about that are high and low in that genre, rough product.
Doree: I'm excited.
Kate: All right. Well, listen, we'll brainstorm off the air, but hopefully that entices more of you to join us.
Doree: Yeah. Um, and Kate, there will be a link cuz people just have to send them a receipt. Correct. And not to send them to us.
Kate: No, not to us. There is a link click that link. You're gonna enter your name, your email, any other pertinent information it asks for, and then just a screenshot of, um, either your book order or your library request, whatever. It's
Doree: Amazing.
Kate: That's it? Yes. And, and you know, I did pose a question on my Instagram, Dory, should I get the eggplant emoji tattooed on my body? Is that a hard? No for you.
Doree: I, I mean, I think it's like cute and funny and like would really be a funny thing to do to commemorate both your book and forever 35. But like, do you really want that on your body?
Kate: I kind of don't care. I don't okay. I would possibly, I was just posed the cuz so many people I've been and then I'll shut up. But so many people I've been signing books have requested either an eggplant reference or me stamping the eggplant. It was like very sweet to have people be like, oh, and may I please have the eggplant? And I was like, yeah. And then on my brain, I was like, man, these listeners are amazing. If like, by some magic, my book becomes like some hit. Should I just like honor that by getting an eggplant emoji tattoo on
Doree: My
Kate: Body? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. You
Doree: There, you I'm dumbstruck Kate. There
Kate: Is, there is a tattoo parlor called ephemeral that makes tattoos that last for like one year and then they fade. So maybe that's the ticket.
Doree: Oh, I've never heard of that. That's cool.
Kate: Yeah. I've been on their wait list. So I kind of have like a lingering appointment.
Doree: Oh, OK. All right.
Kate: Now, Dory, you very kindly shared my book with your mom who was visiting. Oh, I did.
Doree: Yes. Are your parents, she still,
Kate: Are they still visit or have
Doree: They left? No. No, they left this morning.
Kate: How was it having them visit?
Doree: It was really nice actually. Yeah, it was really, it was really lovely. Um, my mom did read your book,
Kate: Which is very nice. I appreciate. So
Doree: She really enjoyed it. She also could not stop talking about that. You use in the book.
Kate: I do. I use a proverb or,
Doree: Or like a saying.
Kate: Okay.
Doree: I guess at some point and I, I did not remember this specifically, but I guess at some point you said comparison is the thief of joy. And my mother had never heard this expression before.
Kate: No way. She hadn't,
Doree: She hadn't. And she thought it was so smart and, and like deep and she wrote down and like she's very into it. She was also very into, this is not a spoiler, but she was very into, um, the moon struck references. It's one of her favorite movies. I
Kate: Really, she wrote this book for your mom. She
Doree: Just rewatched it. Yes. She was slightly confused when the, um, chapter perspectives changed.
Kate: That's okay. I mean,
Doree: I had to explain it to her, but then she got it. Um, but yeah, she loved it. She said it was really delightful. So Roberta, you got the Roberta seal of approval. She also told your English teacher about it.
Kate: Oh my God. She did.
Doree: Yes, she did.
Kate: Wait. She's my high school history.
Doree: Oh, sorry. I'm so sorry.
Kate: It I'm it's okay.
Doree: Um, your high school history teacher, you um, yeah, so she knows about it.
Kate: Oh, I'm touched. Well, what else did you, what else did you do? Did you have some like bonding time with your parents? Did you get a break?
Doree: Was this stressful? I did get a break. I told them on Sunday afternoon, they cuz Matt and I had to record our podcast that they had to be in charge of Henry. And they were, they took him to the park. They had a great time. Um, but my mom and I watched some television together. We watched the Parisian or LA all say, which is on Netflix. It is a reality TV show in French about a family that sells real estate. That sells luxury real estate now. Ooh.
Kate: Okay. Okay.
Doree: You may be saying to yourself, of course you watch this story. This is like, I mean the Venn diagram of like all of your interests, like attractive brothers in a family, real estate business in Paris selling luxury real estate. I mean, hello. So, and to which I would say you're right. And I tried watching this last year when it first came out, they're on season two now. And episode one had so much setup and not very many houses
Kate: And you were not abused.
Doree: No. I was like, I'm here for the houses. I mean, I'm also here for the family, but I was just like, eh, and this isn't for me. And then my mom and I were looking for something to watch and I was like, you know what? We could give, like we watched the trailer of season two and my mom was like, Ooh, this looks good. And I was like, you know what? I tried this last year, but maybe we can just jump right into season two and see where that takes us. And it was really enjoyable. I don't know if the rest of season one got better or if they just hit their stride in season two, but I highly recommend it. So
Kate: This is like selling sunset, but French,
Doree: It's more like million dollar listing if you ever watch that show. Okay. Selling sunset is like essentially a scripted soap opera at this point, I feel like. Um, but what's so like these are like kind of, they sort of seem like intellectual real estate agents. I mean, they're so French, you know what I
Kate: Mean? I'm looking at them right now. These are hot French people. They're
Doree: Hot French people. The two oldest brothers especially are very attractive. Um, and, and like in this season, some of their clients are these like really rich. There've been a couple of really rich women in their forties and they're just so like cool and French.
Kate: Oh you and like you and me.
Doree: Yeah. Like us, if we were buying like a 5 million Euro. Um, so yeah, so it's like kind of escapist. It's actually really cool to see like what luxury real estate in France looks like.
Kate: Yeah. I'm very curious. I'm assuming it doesn't look the same as in the United States.
Doree: No, it doesn't. It's very different. And like people want different things and it's kind of cool to see the geography and I'm just, I'm just into it. We watched, I can't remember if we watched three episodes or four episodes, but we watched a bunch of episodes and I'm in, I'm committed
Kate: To French. People use the same terms like on house hunters and people are like, oh, here's the great room. And you're like, what?
Doree: Well, you know, actually, it's funny you say that because I feel like here in the United States, people have stopped saying master bedroom,
Kate: Master,
Doree: Master suite. Now they now say primary bedroom or primary suite. Um, they have not gotten that memo in France. Yeah. Okay.
Kate: Pay attention.
Doree: Yep. Yep. Yep.
Kate: Okay. Interesting.
Doree: Interesting. Um, but yeah, the it it's, it's, it's enjoyable.
Kate: It's enjoyable. All right. Now I'm gonna tell you, I am not going to dismiss this recommendation. Like I did when you recommended call my agent
Doree: And then like a year later you were like, this should, that was amazing.
Kate: Yeah. I'm not gonna do that this time, this time. I'm going to say, I bet. You're right. And I will watch it.
Doree: Oh, that's
Kate: The same.
Doree: Oh gosh. Okay. Oh, and also, you know what? One of my favorite new shows got renewed Abbott elementary.
Kate: I also need to watch Abbott elementary. I'm so excited about, I know, I think I'm gonna love it. Right. You're
Doree: Gonna love it.
Kate: It's what everybody says.
Doree: It's really great. Um, anyway. All right. Should we take a little breaky break
Kate: Dory?
Doree: Yes. What
Kate: Break? Breaky break.
Doree: I can't say breaky break now. You, I just,
Speaker 3: I, I mean,
Doree: I've
Kate: Never heard anything like that. Come outta your mouth. Breaky break.
Doree: Well, listen, I was just feeling that them I'm in the mood to say breaky break what? My God, I contain multitudes. I
Speaker 3: Know.
Kate: I
Doree: Love
Kate: It. That seems like something. I would say breaky
Doree: Break. You know what? Maybe you're rubbing off on me. Oh
Kate: Boy. For better or for worse. Good luck with that do, because it's not great over here. You, yes. Let's take a breaky break.
Doree: Okay. Let's do it
Kate: Dory. Uh, oftentimes we get people who share their hot tips about dealing with eczema and, uh, that is what this next email from a listener contains.
Doree: Well. And as someone who has X eczema, I am especially, uh, curious in this rec about this recommendation.
Kate: Yeah. I was gonna follow up and ask if you had used it, have you?
Doree: Um, I have not.
Kate: Okay. Well here, here's what this listener said.
Text: Uh, this may be too late to be of use. They were referring to a person who had written in, but I wanted to suggest, mention a product brand. I don't think I've ever heard mentioned it is Derma E the sensitive skin moisturizer and face cleanser. The price point is pretty good. They seem to be very aware of the environment and ingredients in their products. I am very prone to redness and reactions and have found this super helpful. I really like the consistency of the moisturizer and it does not have a scent. Have you all tried any of their products? Also, one thing I've learned about my eczema and I assume everyone is a bit different, but in case it's helpful on areas of my body that I am most prone to it. Parentheses calves. I only wash one to two times a week with plain goats, milk soap, and cannot use anything that has the formula of lotion on those areas.
I'm not sure what it is, but I think it is maybe the alcohol huge guest there. I have tried every lotion, any dermatologist or friend has recommended since I was 13. If it exists, I have tried it instead. I have found for daily care using either a body oil post shower, or a lotion bar, any other time of, I get one with calendula in it for calming. I use love and Leche. Obviously a prescription steroid when needed, still has to be used, but I barely use them now that I use this regimen. Hope that is useful.
Doree: Okay. Okay.
Kate: I've, I've found Derma E when whole foods does their like beauty bag every year. I think I've tried Derma E from that.
Doree: Oh,
Kate: But that would be the only place I've tried it.
Doree: I've never tried it.
Kate: I think
Doree: It's like a
Kate: Foods. Yeah. I'm not sure if it's a drug store buy or like a whole foods buy Derma E who sells
Doree: Target,
Kate: Target targets. Derma E okay. To beauty. So it's.
Doree: Oh,
Kate: All right. Okay. Thanks for this wreck. We'll definitely try. We'll keep them in mind the next time we're dealing with. I mean, I don't deal with eczema, but old door over there. Does you, you get it on your chest? Like your neck and chest?
Doree: No. So I like, I, I almost, I very rarely spontaneously get it anymore, but I've had a persistent patch. Like if it gets triggered by something, it is like hard for it to go away. So I have this patch on the back of my neck that I got from a necklace.
Kate: Ooh. That
Doree: I stop wearing like over a year ago, because it was really irritating my skin. Um, and yeah, so I have I've, I've been dealing with it there. And then I only sort of recently got rid of the patch that was on my ring finger. That was from my wedding ring. Gosh. And my engagement ring. So yeah. So I don't wear my rings anymore. Um, so I don't know my, like my jewelry situation is like not great.
Kate: Wow.
Doree: I say,
Kate: God damnit, that's annoying. I
Doree: Know. Isn't that annoying.
Kate: It is. It's very annoying. Sorry.
Doree: Thanks for seeing me.
Kate: Do you wanna take this next email,
Doree: Kate? I would like nothing more.
Email: Hi, Kat and Dor. What are your thoughts on self tanners? I live in Seattle and I'm super fair skinned, and I'm basically translucent. I'm about to go to Arizona for my parents' 40th wedding anniversary party and family photo shoot. It's quite warmer in Arizona and I'm going to wear a dress for both. I was Instagram ad targeted by I Macias self Tanner. And I'm just wondering, is this a good idea? The last time I tried self Tanner, it was streaky orange and smelled terrible. Have there been improvements in the past few years in this area? Or should I just stay away?
Kate: Well, I, I for iage is a past sponsor of our podcast. And while I've never tried their self Tanner, I did really like their,
Doree: Yes. I also like their, um, primer and foundation.
Kate: So, I mean, I think if you're curious, I, I definitely like this brand. Um, I haven't tried self Tanner since like those bottle of like jargons tanning cream. That's what I was like. Right. Yeah,
Doree: Yeah. Yeah.
Kate: Have you ever had a spray tan?
Doree: I have. Yeah.
Kate: Like when did you, is that a frequent thing that you did or just it for special occasions?
Doree: Um, I did it once in like 2004 because my friend and I were, when I lived in Philadelphia, my friend and I were going to Atlantic city for the weekend.
Kate: Oh my God.
Doree: And I decided to get a spray tan and you know what? It looked amazing.
Kate: Really.
Doree: I'm not gonna lie. Yes. It looked great. I subsequently did not get one for a very long time. And then when I worked at Buzzfeed, I mean, this was probably like 2015 or someone at Buzzfeed was doing a post about like the celebrity spray Tanner, Jimmy Coco. And they had them come to the office and they asked if anyone wanted to get a spray tan go
Kate: On.
Doree: And I said, sure, I'll try. And Kate, I looked insane.
Kate: It was
Doree: So dark that I just like, I looked crazy and
Kate: Oh, no,
Doree: I was like, this is not great. I don't like how I look here.
Kate: Oh my goodness.
Doree: So
Kate: I can't believe that.
Doree: So that, that is my only caution when you are very pale about spray tanning, because at least in my experience, even the like lightest shade of spray tan was still much darker, tended to be much darker than my actual skin. And I just felt like it looked really weird for some reason that didn't happen when I, or at least to my recollection that did not happen in 2004. But you know, maybe I, I am misremembering this. Um, and then in terms of the lotions and the like the self applied self Tanner stuff, I, I don't know. I don't have any personal experience with it. I've just sort of like reconciled myself to the fact that I'm pale and that's just the way it is. And so that's, I mean, look, you're gonna be comfortable how you're gonna be comfortable, but my instinct would be to be like, fuck the self Tanner. Just Go
Kate: That's, that's my instinct too. Especially if you've never tried it, I would be hesitant to be like, I'm gonna bust this out for my parents' anniversary party where like I'm gonna be in photographed in pictures and things like that.
Doree: Yeah.
Kate: In case it doesn't turn out how you want it
Doree: To turn out. Yeah.
Kate: That being said
Doree: A good call.
Kate: Yeah. Like if you're interested in self Tanner in general, I definitely would try it out. I would try, you know, your own. And I would maybe try getting a light spray tan. I have never had a spray tan and I keep like meaning to get one for life. And then I just forget, but I too have just resigned to the fact that I'm pale and I just, I just have a, a good hat. You know, you bring a big hat,
Doree: They don't have a good hat. Does anyone still go to tanning beds? Is that still a,
Kate: Oh God, I do not have you?
Doree: Really question. I think I have. I, but I like don't quote me on that. You know what I mean?
Kate: I won't, but I have definitely in like my senior year of college, I got into going on tanning beds because it was so oh, wow. Well, I was so cold that in Maine, you would go in the tanning for the bed and it would just like roast you for 10 minutes and it felt amazing. So yeah, there was like a time when I was that's 20, 21. Yeah. That I definitely visited tanning salons for like a hot second, but I didn't do it
Doree: Too much. Oh, okay. Okay. Yeah.
Kate: They're not very good for you. So I would not do that. Turns
Doree: Out
Kate: Turns a big booth of light, not the best, but I am looking like there are, there still are tanning salons.
Doree: Yeah. Yeah. There are.
Kate: Wow. Should I go get a tan,
Doree: A spray tan?
Kate: No. Should I go get it go into a sun? I'm joking. I wouldn't, I wouldn't do that.
Doree: No, you shouldn't
Kate: Not Kate. No, no, I won't. I won't. That is truly just a joke. I would honestly never get in one of these things
Doree: Again. OK. Thank God.
Kate: All right. Well, move on
Doree: On
Kate: For you Doree text.
Doree: Hello. You all right.
Text: Hey, y'all Doree. I know you have been dabbling in meal planning and my partner and I are want to start, do you use any templates or apps or anything to keep things organized? I'm just not sure where to start. I'll add that. We typically do our grocery shopping separately, which kind of drives me crazy. So I would love to take this opportunity to consolidate our shopping as well. Any Rex are appreciated, and then they included the following emojis, eggplant, horse head. And I mean, that kinda sums us up, you know,
Kate: Eggplant, horse, head and bath.
Doree: Yep.
Kate: If we had a t-shirt, you know, those t-shirts where it's like, you know, like for shits Creek, it's like David and Alexis and Johnny, you know, those like shirts that people make.
Doree: Oh, yes, yes. Yeah.
Kate: Um, that could be ours.
Doree: That could be ours.
Kate: It could be eggplant and horse head and bath
Doree: Eggplant and horse head and bath.
Kate: Yep.
Doree: Well, there we go.
Kate: What have been your tools for meal planning? How are you keeping track of everything? Are you using an app or are you just kind of, you know, writing it down and following your own, your own path?
Doree: Um, I'm not using an app. I have a running Google doc of meals that have been suggested to me that I have just sort of come across and I keep those all in the Google doc. And then I have a separate spreadsheet where I will theoretically like plan I've sort of fallen behind on the planning. Like I've been kind of making decisions on the fly, which is okay. But it means I'm just going to the grocery store a lot.
Kate: Um, yeah.
Doree: So I probably need to like plan a little bit more. Um, but you know, now that I've been doing it for, well, let's see, oh, you know what, I've been doing it for. Like, it'll be two months next week.
Kate: Wow. Wow.
Doree: Um, I have some like good data on like meals that were easy meals that people ate meals that people didn't eat meals. You
Kate: Know what I mean? Yeah. I think it's important to write all that stuff down to,
Doree: So I'm just sort of like monitoring all of that. Um
Kate: OK.
Doree: Yeah. But yeah, overall I'd say it's going pretty well. And you, you know what, you might, you might find it to use an app listener. Um, I, I do not.
Kate: Yeah. I use a Google doc.
Doree: Yeah. Sometimes just a good old Google doc is like the way to
Kate: Go. You know, I have to say there's nothing like a Google doc. It's just, I also use the notes app, um, because I use all apple products so that, you know, uploads to the cloud. So I'll use the notes app or Google
Doree: Docs. I use the notes app for my grocery
Kate: Lists. Yeah. It's pretty great. I, I I've really taken a liking to the old notes app. All right. Well, Doree, it's time to take a break and we back to more of you in a second.
Doree: Okay. Sounds good. All right. We are back
Kate: A question about jugs. This listener writes
Text: hi, first time writing in love the pod, your episode on sports bras for the busty among us stuck in my head. And so I figured it was worth asking. Do y'all have everyday bra recommendations. I have large jugs, as you might say, and have been in a hellish struggle over the past four years to find a bra that is a comfortable B is supportive and C doesn't feel like my boobs are in an industrial cage. Any thoughts would be so appreciated?
Doree: Hmm.
Kate: Excellent question.
Doree: Um, I really like my not Tori
Kate: Bras. Okay. Okay.
Doree: But I, this listener says they have large jugs. I don't know what that means like mm. Do you mean a DEC cup or do you mean like a JUP because that, those are very different recommendations. Yeah. And I don't know, I have double DS. And so I don't, if you are much bigger than I am, I don't know that my recommendations are going to necessarily hold water for you or hold your jugs. Hold your jugs of water. Oh my, I dunno. Um, anyway, but that's, that's what works for me. I,
Kate: I, so on Doree's recommendation, I did a virtual Braford bra fitting at Nordstrom. Um, I've also done one through Jeanette's bras, which is for size D and up, and I personally think that is the best way to figure out what works for you. Um, because for example, like I, there were certain bras that felt great by, by one, you know, by one line. And then I try another bra on that line and I hated it and I would change sizes. So I do think notta is a great line. Um, I have some Chantelle, I think I have, I have some walk hole. I have
Doree: Some, I have some walk hole too.
Kate: Yeah. I have some Simone peril, I think is the brand. Oh, um, yeah. And this, these were all on recommendations. Um, from Nordstrom, I will say, I do think it is really worth spending money on bras, but I think you also, and this is something that like I hate, but is just part of life. I guess you kind of have to manage your expectations because these bras, like, like I find, I find bras to be a very, like, it's good to spend money on them, but what I don't like is that bras also wear out the same way a shoe was gonna wear out. And because in my brain I'm like, I'm gonna spend money on a bra and it's gonna last forever, but they don't. And so bras can be a pricey investment for sure. I do think you have to kind of just that you're gonna have to keep reinvesting if you, you know, if you're seeking comfort.
Doree: Yeah.
Kate: So that's,
Doree: you know, I think that's a, that's a good, um, analysis.
Kate: The, the Oprah Winfrey episode about bra fitting is burned in my brain. Like she had everyone in the audience get fitted and it was, it was like a revel, it was revelatory and, and she was kinda the first person. Wow. Would say like, you've gotta spend money on bras. You wear them every day. And I was like, oh yeah, like I gotta invest in bras. I have, I have big boots. Oh yeah. I do Oprah. Thank you. Anyway. Um, maybe, you know, you know what else I liked? I did, um, third love who has sponsored the show in the past has a bro called the minimizer bras that I really liked, that I felt was super supportive for my large jugs. So that was one of theirs that I wore a lot as well. That is another stretched out. Yeah. Hot tip. All right. Well, let's move on our final listener message. A voicemail.
Voicemail: Hey, um, this is a friend from ha Massachusetts. I just wanted to call in and come Asrate with ate in the sense of not wanting to show someone something until it's like a hundred percent perfect or expecting things to be errorless, even though that's not really how drafts and like work. Um, I have struggled with this, my entire professional career as a speech and language therapist. Um, and I've had to learn a lot of these skills on the job and had to participate a lot. And I struggled greatly with that. Cause it meant that I had to be in a very vulnerable thought and take constructive criticism and not, and somehow try to figure out how up about making mistakes, even though I was like to, and now I'm learning yet another set of skills. And I, after every single, like constructive criticism meeting with my mentor have to remind myself that I'm not expected to be perfect. I'm not expected to things. And that's part of the process. And that's why you ask for help and, and have kind of these sorts of relationships and, and things. Um, otherwise life would be very boring if you just kinda did the same thing all the time, but it's really hard to keep that perspective. When as a professional, you think you should just be the end, all be all and know everything all the time. Um, and also just that judgment is really, really hard to overcome because I feel like hate you and I are very similar and we're kinda the harshest critics of ourselves. And no one would really judge us as partially as we do, but yet, for some reason we set up rambling, hope you and sunny.
Kate: You are really hard on yourself. That's definitely true. And in fact, I actually think you're hard on yourself in a different way than I am. Like I think I take other people's feedback and internalize it. Whereas I think your feedback is coming from yourself to yourself. Is that, is that, is it okay that I say that? Yeah. Yeah. Like I think I can't, like, I don't even know if I have an opinion on myself cuz I'm so worried about what other people think, but I think you're very, you do put, you do put a lot of pressure on yourself. Oh, it's true. It's true. Yeah. Well, I mean, as we discussed at the beginning of, of this episode, comparison is the thief of joy indeed. And uh, it does Rob you of pleasant moments when you spend all your time, bearing yourself to others, which is thing I I've done for sure.
Kate: Yeah. Well I appreciated this listener's vulnerability. It really resonated with me. Yeah, me too. We was somebody else out there. Well, Kate, this has been a pleasure as always happy to be here. Always happy to be here. Same, you know, same, same, same, yes. Same. Wouldn't wanna be anywhere else. Well, Nope. Doree. I am off to go pick up a praying mantis for my daughter's ninth.
Doree: Ooh, that's exciting. That was our number one gift request.
Kate: So that's what I'm for the rest of the day.
Doree: I hope you have a great day and thank you to everybody for listening.