Listener Q&A: Semi-Rich Auntie Vibes
Kate has a bonkers idea she shares with Doree that she’s been keeping a mystery! Then, they hear from listeners about their updated 5 minute makeup routines and the teens who can’t get enough of the Drunk Elephant ~aesthetic~, and try to help out a listener who is in a real pickle with their work organization.
Mentioned in this Episode
Use the promo code Forever35 for 15% off!
Use the promo code Forever35 for 15% off!
Lisa Eldridge Liquid Blush - discontinued
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Transcript
Kate: Hello and welcome to Forever35, a podcast about the things we do to take care of ourselves. I am Kate Spencer.
Doree: And I'm Doree Shafrir.
Kate: And I know we're not experts.
Doree: We're not, we're two friends who like to talk a lot about serums
Kate: And today we are recording in person like it's 2019.
Doree: I love this for us.
Kate: I do too. It's like the before times.
Doree: It is like the before times.
Kate: I can look into your eyes as I tell you an idea that I've had that might be the dumbest idea I've ever had.
Doree: I can't wait. This is what Kate has written in our document. I have a kind of bonkers idea. I have been stewing on and I want to float it by Doree, but I want it to be a mystery until we record.
Kate: I didn't want to put this thought that I've had in my head into the document. God, I didn't want to come.
Doree: Oh my God.
Kate: I want to just drop it in front of you and get your honest reaction.
Doree: Okay, I'm ready.
Kate: Okay. I've been thinking, what if I got the haircut? What if I got the Rachel?
Doree: What? Okay.
Kate: I've been watching a lot of friends, And I feel like it's okay. I've been watching a lot of friends. I'm in the second season right now. It's kind of been my comfort food comfort watch show.
Doree: Okay.
Kate: And I'm kind of been watching and I'm like, you know what? That's not a bad haircut. Nobody has it right now. Could I?
Doree: No.
Kate: Could I do this?
Doree: Don't do it.
Kate: Could I do this and be cool? Could I get a long layered?
Doree: Kate? This is a no. This is a no. I'm sorry. Look, you asked for my opinion.
Kate: Yes, yes, yes.
Doree: And I'm giving it to you
Kate: Now. I had had this thought for a couple of weeks. I've been like, as I'm watching all these friends episodes, the haircut's growing on me and growing on me. And not every haircut is Courtney Cox is a very choppy short haircut. That's not, it's very nineties, but the Rachel keeps growing on me. And then, do you know what is so funny? I was reading Golden Globes like fashion headlines, and one of them was like Jennifer Aniston brings back a version of the Rachel at the Golden Globes. And I literally had the thought of, oh no, she took my idea,
Doree: But it wasn't,
Kate: oh no, she had a light Rachel. Her hair is pretty long, but it's a little shorter. But it was just a voluminous kind of look. You feel really strongly about this, that a nineties Rachel haircut is not a vibe for us right now.
Doree: I feel.
Kate: Like in a modern way,
Doree: I feel like it's hard to make it feel modern.
Kate: I guess I'm kind of okay. Just hear me out. Just hear me out that
Doree: I can't see.
Kate: Oh, Sorry. That's a no.
Doree: That's a no. The super.
Kate: I wouldn't do the chunky highlights. I'm showing Doree pictures. Jennifer Aniston on friends.
Doree: That's a no.
Kate: It's a very layered look.
Doree: I feel like you kind of verge into Kate Goslin territory.
Kate: I've thought about this,
Doree: Which if that's what you're going for
Kate: Now, see, look at this. Jennifer Aniston brings back her iconic Rachel haircut at the 2024 Golden Globes. Now this is what a 2024 Rachel looks like. Everyone I'll link to this so you yourself can see.
Doree: Okay, I don't hate that. I feel like my hair is kind of a version of that.
Kate: Oh, look at this. The tables have turned, Doree already has the Rachel,
Doree: But that does not look like what you just showed me. I feel like it has a stretch. It's a real for them to say that. That is the Rachel.
Kate: I agree. I agree. I think, I mean, here's another look where it's really just like a lightly layered long Bob.
Doree: It's a Lob. Yeah. But I just thought it was interesting that I've been having this thought. I've been having this thought. Oh look, here's another article 20 90s Bob Ideas that ooze cool and Ease. And there's a picture of Rachel, of the Rachel, just something about this haircut. Oh my God. It's also kind of like a Meg Ryan nineties haircut.
Yes, it is.
Kate: And it was all speaking to me.
Doree: I mean, look, Kate, I don't want to crush your dreams.
Kate: I mean, I should bring this to my hairstylist. I haven't had a haircut in quite a few months and I need to go to one.
Doree: See what they think.
Kate: Oh, they're going to laugh at me. I can already,
Doree: If they're like, huh?
Kate: She's going to be like, Kate, what are you talking about? I'm like, you know what I could do? I could get a haircut and I could ask her to style it like the Rachel, and then I could really see what I'm thinking, what I'm doing to myself.
Doree: That's an interesting idea.
Kate: I don't know. I just have had this,
Doree: Look, Kate, if you feel called to do this, by all means, you should do it because you know what the other thing is? Hair grows. That's the nice thing about hair is if you decide, you know what? This is actually not really for me. It's going to grow out.
Kate: Well, I guess I've also just on a larger scale, had this kind of thought of why am I even trying to subscribe to trends? Why not just do something that I want? Because what is the point?
Doree: Yeah. I'm with you on that.
Kate: Who is judging me and do I even care
Doree: All legitimate questions?
Kate: And can the Rachel have a comeback or is that something that, because certain hairstyles do come back around, I don't know if you've noticed
Doree: Totally,
Kate: but teen boys are wearing a weird exaggerated mullet situation right now.
Doree: I feel like a lot of them have that skater long bang thing happening.
Kate: There's a fluffy bang thing. But then there's also kind of a long in the back thing happening.
Doree: Oh, Interesting.
Kate: That I, I'm noting. And so I'm like, do I get on the Rachel train before? What if somebody cooler does it or will I just look like the most mom who ever mommed? That's a possibility also,
Doree: I mean, you are a mom.
Kate: I am. I'm a woman in her mid forties. I'm a mom.
Doree: You're a woman in her mid forties.
Kate: I'm all those things. I'm not a 28-year-old TV character who just left her husband at the altar and is now a waitress at Central Perk.
Doree: Totally.
Kate: I'm not that.
Doree: Yes.
Kate: But I'm not going to lie. I have been having the thought in a serious manner.
Doree: Okay. I think that talking to your hairstylist about this is a good idea.
Kate: Well, I'll be making that appointment soon. I got to get a little color. I have legit grays growing in. What's interesting about gray hairs, and I don't think you really, do you have gray hair yet?
Doree: I have a few
Kate: Mine. They're short. They're little shorties who are growing. They've just, they're new babies that have arrived.
Doree: They've popped up. Yeah.
Kate: Yeah. So is that just what happens all of a sudden new hair grows in gray?
Doree: I guess.
Kate: I don't know what I was thinking that my long hair would turn,
Doree: Would suddenly turn.
Kate: That obviously understand isn't what it is. But I didn't expect them to be a little short hairs. I either. I thought I would just see gray at the end of my, I don't know.
Doree: Yeah, no. Yes. I feel like I've seen both. Sometimes I'll see a hair that is gray at the top. So it started growing in gray, but it didn't turn the whole strand gray.
Kate: Right, right. Well, I've got little gray baby hairs floating around, which I don't mind. I don't color my hair to hide grays. Maybe I will someday.
Doree: Totally.
Kate: I don't really have enough, but I am kind of just intrigued by this new phase of life of like, is this it? Are you here now? Gray hair?
Doree: They're here now.
Kate: Yeah. I mean,
Doree: They're here to stay.
Kate: I mean, I have had a gray hair elsewhere. You don't have a gray pube. You don haven't had a gray pubic hair yet, Doree.
Doree: No, I haven't.
Kate: You haven't?
Doree: I don't think so.
Kate: Well take a look today.
Doree: Okay.
Kate: Take a gander down below. You might be grayer.
Doree: Oh my God.
Kate: Grayer in the crotch than on the head. Aren't you glad you came in person to do this?
Doree: I'm so glad
Kate: Whenever people are like, I listened to this podcast in the car with my kids. I'm always just like, you're like, boy. Oh no. Okay. Oh no. Well, yeah. So that's what's been up with me.
Doree: Okay.
Kate: Having serious thoughts about the Rachel, anything new with you?
Doree: Oh, here's something that I've told you in person, but I haven't talked about on the podcast or I texted to you or I told you in real life, which is, so Quai is a sponsor of this podcast.
Kate: Wait a second. You said that was such an intentional French accent, but maybe that is how it's supposed to be pronounced.
Doree: I think they wanted to pronounce Quai, and they're known for their haircare products.
Kate: Oh my gosh. I know where this is going. I'm so excited for you.
Doree: But they also sent us some of their perfume, their Melrose Place perfume
Kate: Speak of the nineties. What a perfect nineties name for perfume.
Doree: Perfect nineties name these days. I dunno if it was like this in the nineties, but now Melrose Place is a very trendy little street with lots of very expensive boutiques. But I put it on, I tried it out and I was like, what is happening? All of a sudden I had a scent memory.
Kate: I love a sensory deja vu moment
Doree: That I was like, what? And then I was like, oh my God, I know what this smells like. It smells like Lancome.
Kate: I wonder, you're speaking with a French accent today, which you wore, right? Didn't you wear that?
Doree: I did wear that. It was one of my favorite perfumes. It launched in 1999, so I think I first got it either at the end of college or right after I graduated.
Kate: Very adult perfume.
Doree: Very adult perfume. And they don't make it anymore. It's been discontinued.
Kate: Oh.
Doree: I looked into getting some a few years ago and I was like, wait, I don't want to buy a 15-year-old bottle on eBay.
Kate: Yeah, I know.
Doree: So I was like, okay, am I crazy or does this actually smell like Lancome? And I looked up the ingredients and in fact, they're very similar. They are very similar. So Quai describes their Melrose Plays perfume as a velvety rich rose scent infused with a swoon worthy blend of bergamo, lechy, white musk, champagne and more. And Lancome we is, let's see. I want to get, oh yeah. Top notes are water, hyacinth, vodka, bergamo, clementine nectarine, mandarin orange and petite grain. Middle notes are white flowers, green, apple, lily lily of the valley. So base notes are pineapple and rose base notes are water, lily, musk, cedar, woody notes, and amber. So it's very similar vibe.
Kate: I like that Melrose place scent quite a bit actually. It's very floral. It gives me lily of the valley, which is not what they use in their description, but that's kind of where I land with it. But it's a very nice floral scent. Have you been wearing it?
Doree: Yes, I have been Kate.
Kate: Wow.
Doree: Yeah. So that was really weird for me because I wasn't expecting it to smell like that. And it took me a minute to be like, what am I smelling?
Kate: Oh, What a weird feeling.
Doree: And then I was like, oh my God, this is wee. Which I haven't smelled in years. So now I'm very curious. Did they deliberately? I'm sure they would never say that.
Kate: No, but you draw. I do think people sent creators draw inspiration from past sense. Emily Weiss from Glossier I think has said that their perfume you is based on L Lao's Kayak 10 Oh or inspired by, or that was her favorite perfume or something. You can't unsmell smells that you like.
Doree: Totally. So in the reviews of Quai Melrose's Place, people are saying, someone said, it reminds me of Vera Wang Pink perfume. They describe it as floral. It's very similar. It's also very funny to me. They say we bottled the good taste of Melrose Place smell like LA sunsets and valet parking.
Kate: That's hilarious. Valet parking smells like very expensive sometimes. But valet parking is a very big part of Los Angeles life.
Doree: That is true. That is very true. So like I said, they are a sponsor of this podcast, but this is not an ad.
Kate: This is not sponsored content.
Doree: This is not a branded segment.
Kate: None of those things.
Doree: I just wanted to bring it up. But we do have a discount code. So if you go to their website, which is theouai.com, T-H-E-O-U ai, and you use promo code Forever35, you get 15% off any prod.
Kate: I mean, since we're talking about them, I have been using their detox shampoo for the past year before they were a sponsor and I love it. So if you have heard talk of it, it's like a lovely, it's a clarifying shampoo, but it gets all the product buildup out of your head, which I have so much by the end of the week. There's so much sweat and dry shampoo caked on my scalp. It's like a protective barrier. I'm be honest. I often exercise in the morning and do not shower.
Doree: Oh, interesting.
Kate: I'm just being real honest today.
Doree: I love radical honesty.
Kate: Well, to get the Rachel, I'm going to have to put a lot of volumizing products in my hair.
Doree: That's true. And you know what? You're also going to have to style it. You're probably going to have to blow dry it all the time.
Kate: It's almost like it's a hairstyle that can only be achieved by an actor who's on a TV show with a person with it all day long.
Doree: That's weird.
Kate: We're going to give it a go.
Doree: Alright, well keep me posted.
Kate: Okay, I will.
Doree: We're going to take a break, but before we do that, just a reminder, we do put links to everything you mentioned on the show at Forever35podcast.com. We're on Instagram @Forever35podcast. We have a Patreon at patreon.com/forever35 where we do some casual chats.
Kate: We do a legitimate weekly thing called the Casual Chat
Doree: Called the Casual Chat,
Kate: which is what you just heard,
Doree: But longer and even more real.
Kate: Oh, you hear my kid walking in. You hear all sorts of things.
Doree: And we're also recapping the oc. That's also where you can find our product recall episodes. Some recent bangers have been,
Kate: oh my gosh,
Doree: Clinique,
Kate: Sephora,
Doree: Sephora. I mean we have really been doing the All Stars lately. So that is at patreon.com/forever35. There's also a seven day free trial, so you can check it out, see if it's for you. We have our favorite products at ShopMy.us/forever35. I think Melrose Place is going to have to go on that shop.
Kate: You're going to have to put it in that fragrance category.
Doree: Yeah, exactly. We have a newsletter at Forever35podcast.com/newsletter. And we love when you call or text us.
Kate: Oh my gosh. And can I pose a question?
Doree: Yes.
Kate: Should the Rachel come back as a hairstyle?
Doree: Okay.
Kate: Yes or no? Please let us know what you think.
Doree: I think you all know what to do.
Kate: Don't take Doree's side.
Doree: Take my side. Okay.
Kate: Oh, but yeah, if you want to reach
Doree: Us, you can call or text us at (781) 591-0390. You can also email us at Forever35podcast@gmail.com. Alright, we are going to take a short break and we'll be right back.
Kate: Alright. I am so excited to bring back a segment we like to call Five minute face, five minute makeup routines. People were sharing their minute makeup routines. And you know what? I found one, I dug one up that hadn't been shared, I don't think.
Doree: Okay.
Kate: And I was like, you know what? I love this genre. I love a five minute look. I love perfect. I love taking no time to put on my makeup. I love not curling my eyelashes. I love, you know what else I love doing? I did this the other day using a mascara and being like, oh, this is definitely two years old. I should throw this out and then putting it right back in the drawer where I'll have that thought the next time I use it.
Doree: Great.
Kate: But here is a text with a listener's five minute makeup routine. And again, love to share these. So if you have one and I'll allow a seven or a 10 minute, definitely a two or a three, let us know. Hi Cat. Do another five minute face for you all. I start with Mac, face and body. I smudge a dime sized or smaller amount into my face and neck with my hands. Next, I use makeup forever, HD concealer, which I apply under my eyes and along the bottom inch of my jawline with a small brush, take the excess around my mouth and over my eyelids. I set my under eye with Pat McGrath, skin fetish, sublime perfection under eye powder on another small brush. Then I mush some Lisa Eldridge liquid blush in pink soap onto my cheeks using my fingertips curl my lashes and use Tower 28 mascara. Easy to remove, which is important to me. A brow pencil usually benefit, but I go through trying all the brands, a la Kate and a brow gel, same story. I like doing my lips, but better, more interesting color right now. Loving merit lipstick in millennial. Timed it this morning and did it in four minutes, 30 seconds.
Doree: Wow. Okay. You like merit, don't you?
Kate: I am on the fence with some merit products.
Doree: Okay.
Kate: I like some, but not as much as other people. And I any kind of, for lack of a better word, clean beauty product doesn't last very long. But I really do for ease. I do really like their little cheek thing, but don't love their mascara. I am kind of playing around with some of their products, but I do like them and I love the cheek thing, which it's like a round hard cheek blush. Like a waxy. Why can't I think of what the right word is? I guess a cream
Doree: like a balm, and it's comes in a little pot and you take the lid off and it's rounded and then you just take it and scrape it up your face on either side and then just mush it in. Like this listener says that they mush.
Kate: Okay.
Doree: And then you're done. Now what's so interesting me when I hear people's five minute makeup routines, what everybody includes in the five minutes.
Oh, yes, yes, yes.
Kate: I'm so fascinated that this person sets their under eye with an under eye powder. I wouldn't, I've never even thought about doing that.
Doree: Right, totally. But you would put on concealer.
Kate: I recently did my makeup the other day. I did some concealer. I did maybe the littlest bit of a BB cream cheeks that I had a stick that a highlighter stick I do on my cheeks brow eyelash. And then I played around with this elf, this $3 elf eyeshadow palette that I have that I love. And then I put on that Christian Dior lipstick that you complimented.
Doree: I did compliment it
Kate: via Zoom. But yeah, I just think it's so interesting also that they did the bottom of their jawline. Do you do yourj awline?
Doree: No,
Kate: I need to know more about that.
Doree: I mean, I'm intrigued by it.
Kate: What's down there? What are we,
Doree: I think that's a contouring thing, isn't it?
Kate: I am so baffled by contouring.
Doree: Yeah. I can't,
Kate: I watch so many contouring videos and I watch other people do it and it looks great.
Doree: Do you have contour appropriate makeup?
Kate: Not really, but I do have a bronzer. It's by, say I have this kind of bronzer thing that I kind of dab around where I think you're supposed to contour and then I brush it in. But I'm just like, why am I doing this and what does it do and does this look weird?
Doree: I mean, don't think, it probably doesn't look weird, but sometimes when I watch people do contour, I'm like, what? I don't understand how that ends up looking like that.
Kate: Yeah. They also, they do it. We're watching these videos of them doing it, and they truly do change the shape and the look of their face, and when I do it, it looks like I just have makeup streaked on my face.
Doree: Totally. Right. So maybe is it a blending issue? Is it a shade issue?
Kate: Is it also just, not to be ageist, but is it also just like that ship has sailed for me?
Doree: Maybe.
Kate: I mean, I know you can contour at any age, but it's kind of just like, I don't need this.
Doree: Well, also it's like who has the energy
Kate: And what am I doing this for?
Doree: Right. What are you doing?
Kate: I literally contoured and then went to my kids' elementary school contoured for me.
Doree: That sounds fun. Honestly,
Kate: Doree, we received a really long listener question, and so I have bolded the parts that I think we should read just for time saving properties. But listener, I have your whole message here and I want to honor you, but also because we're making a podcast, I have shortened down some of the key points, so I'll read it and then Doree,
Doree: I was going to say, I don't think I totally follow the bolding, so why don't you do it.
Kate: I'll read it. Hi, Kate and Doree, longtime listener with a time sensitive question for you. I would greatly appreciate your wisdom. I'm graduating in the spring with a bachelor's degree. It's been a sacrifice and a challenge to put myself through school, but I'm finally here. I'm also almost 30 and spent the better part of my twenties working for a women's nonprofit organization in their admin office wearing various hats in several departments. I left on a one year leave of absence to go to school full-time in 2022, and when the one year was up, the current HR director agreed to extend it by another year so that I could finish school and then return to work at the present time or so, I thought since I've been gone, there has been a public scandal with the company leadership and a new wave of management. They go on to kind of describe this and they said, I endured an incredibly toxic work environment for years. So just something to note. I've grown a lot in the past few years personally and professionally, and I'm now a person with some boundaries who tries to advocate for myself while it's uncomfortable to talk up, I think I'm a smart, capable, dedicated, and conscientious person and employee. I was hoping I might be able to return to work in an increased capacity at this company given my new education and prior five years of experience with the company. Yet I feel like I'm being handled suspiciously and I'm being treated as if I am a burden or entitled for advocating for myself, and there may not even be a role for me at all. I have been in talks with them for over two months with no real answers yet. I've been ignored for large chunks of time and generally feel so disappointed by how I'm being treated by a company that I gave so much of my life to. Should I wait around to see what happens and keep fighting for myself? Or should I abandon this altogether and apply for other jobs asking for some advice, kindness or commiseration from you or the community?
Doree: First of all, I am sorry.
Kate: It is really the relationships we have as individuals to the companies we work for is very complex because ultimately they are businesses. I mean even a nonprofit, right? Ultimately, they are all going to be flawed in some way, but we enter into these very intimate relationships with them in which we build a lot of our identity around and we give so much of ourselves to.
Doree: Yes. Well, and I think that when there is a disconnect between an organization's purported values and how they treat their employees, it's a little bit of a mind fuck.
Kate: It's really unsettling to say the very least. I think that this listener, well, one, I would trust your gut feeling about what's going on and that you deserve better. And I think if you can apply for other jobs while you're waiting around and fighting for yourself, there's no reason why you cannot be out there applying for other jobs, sending out your resume, making connections, networking, taking people out to coffee and doing what's best for yourself.
Doree: I completely agree with this. I think that as much as you can, and I know that this is easier said than done, but as much as you can try to take the emotion and the personal feelings out of it and try to get over the kind of cognitive dissonance of this women's advocacy organization sort of treating you badly. I also think that sometimes people start dating people that they think they can fix, and most of the time you can't fix people, and I feel like that is a similar situation here in that it sort of sounds like you're waiting around for them to get better and treat you better. Why would they do that? You know what I mean? They've treated you like this for years. I don't think they're suddenly going to wake up one day and be like, oh, we should treat her better. This is who they are. I know that's hard to hear. I'm sorry if that sounds harsh, but I don't like this for you.
Kate: Yeah. You've done work on yourself, you've gotten a degree, you've worked for this organization and done really well. You definitely deserve an employment experience where you're valued and you get to put all your gifts to good use. That sounds really hard, and it's also scary. This is not, it's not the sexiest job market out there right now, Doree. It's scary trying to find a job.
Doree: Totally. But I think that Kate, your advice is right. You have a job now. It's not great, but you have one. And so while you still have one, you are in a great position to be looking for a new job. You are not in a totally desperate situation.
Kate: Yes. I can't tell they've been on this hiatus, this leave of absence to go to school, but what I can't tell is if they're, they've returned to work just not in the increased capacity that they wanted with room to grow.
Doree: That's what I thought, but maybe I misunderstood.
Kate: Yes. If it's the case that you're not and they're not paying you and you're just sitting there hoping, then bye bye.
Doree: Yeah.
Kate: You've got to make some coin and take care of yourself. Switching gears.
Doree: Switching gears.
Kate: Literally doing a U-turn in the road.
Doree: That's my screeching car.
Kate: That was tiny Screechy car. Back to the old skincare.
Doree: We should actually take another break.
Kate: What
Doree: Is that Okay?
Kate: I guess.
Doree: Okay.
Kate: Okay. We'll take a break then we'll come back. Okay. Okay. Couple teen skincare comments.
Doree: By the way, speaking of Teen Skincare, I feel like now on TikTok and Reddit, all of my suggested posts are about how the teens are taking over Sephora. And I saw TikTok the other day about, from someone who works at Sephora about some 10-year-old girl who came to the counter and she had $900 worth of stuff. And then her mom was like, that's too much, but let her spend $500.
Kate: What?
Doree: It's just all this crazy stuff. I feel like just since we started talking about it, I'm suddenly seeing so much more of it.
Kate: Holy shit, y'all kids don't need this stuff. And I know it's so hard because they want it because they're, I get it. Trust me. I get it
Doree: Okay, here's an email. Hi Cat Andor. I wanted to follow up on how the teens are interested in Drunk Elephant. I'm a middle school art teacher, and I did a lesson on digital art where they had to design their own products and packaging on their iPads. They had to come up with a unique product and half the kids did skincare lines. They were inspired by the packaging from Drunk Elephant, the ordinary. And Summer Fridays when they were presenting their products, a boy asked what toner is and they all froze, started laughing and said they didn't really know. It was a fun look into middle school skincare and how packaging is key. It was also a fun lesson to talk about what we are being sold and how every detail and color is there for a reason. Let's look at packaging from the perspective of an artist rather than a consumer. Thanks for the pod.
Kate: Fascinating.
Doree: Yeah.
Kate: I love, what a cool, first of all, you sound like a fun teacher and I would love to be in your art class. That sounds fascinating. I also think it's really interesting that half the kids did skincare lines. Doesn't that tell you something about
Doree: Yes. What's reaching? I also think it's so funny that they don't even know what half these things actually do.
Kate: I mean, I barely do, and I've been talking about this for God knows how long on this podcast. I mean the power of marketing and consumerism.
Doree: It's really fascinating.
Kate: It is rough. It's fascinating, but I do think it is interesting thinking about these brands and the packaging from the perspective, I guess of an artist is interesting me when we talked about Clinique on our Patreon product recall episode, and the way in which that was branded in this very kind of celery, green, clinical, medicinal, very clean aesthetic. Just interesting the ways in which these choices are made and the reason behind it.
Doree: Yes, I'm with you.
Kate: Alright. Another person wrote us. Hi gals. The topic of skincare and makeup for teens and tweens has come up a couple times recently, I wanted to share an approach I took this past year. I don't have children of my own, but I'm very close to several of my friend's kids think semi rich Auntie Vibes. I love it. The oldest of all these kids turned 12 this past year. Ahead of that, I asked her mom if I could give her a gift of a trip to Ulta for some skincare. I picked her up. We got Starbucks, and then we had a quick review of the Caroline Herns book skincare. She says that teens need a cleanser, a moisturizer, and SBF and something to treat pimples. So that is what we got. Everything was on the drugstore brand side of the store. We talked about brands like Drunk Elephant, who might choose to use really pricey products, adults and what they do. Usually they're too strong for their young skin. She pointed out some products and asked, what would this do? Would I need something like that? We talked about water-based products versus oil-based products. We did pick up one item from her wishlist that overlapped with Caroline's list bubble moisturizer, which, oh my God, my daughter loves. Since then, she has texted me questions about lots of things. We've had self-care sleepovers with her and her sisters, and I did gift her some of the freebie prods I've gotten from Sephora. Just a thought for anyone who may be in a similar position. Okay, so can I just say that one? I just love the role that you're playing, not just skincare influencing, but just as an adult friend. I think it's so important for kids to know other adults besides their parents and to have somebody who they can talk to about these things. I don't think I could go to go with my daughter and have quite the same experience. She would be annoyed at me the whole time and I wouldn't understand. But her friends just, it is not the same when it's your annoying ass mom. I annoy her so much. It's funny to me at this point.
Doree: Oh my God.
Kate: But I love that you have the opportunity to play this role in this person's life because I think Caroline Hirons is right. You don't need a lot of shit and you don't need expensive shit. And let this be a lesson to us adults too. I think that philosophy holds
Doree: Totally.
Kate: It's just that now it's our disposable question mark income that we're spending on the stuff, not like, you know what I mean?
Doree: I do think it's funny though that one of the things on her wishlist was the bubble moisturizer that what your daughters are super into.
Kate: Yes. My daughter, my oldest loves bubble
Doree: power of marketing,
Kate: but Bubble's, pricey and bubble is at Target, but it has, she loves the push moisturizer, bottle thingies.
Doree: Wow.
Kate: I know.
Doree: Wow.
Kate: How are we doing on time, Doree?
Doree: I think we can start to, do you
Kate: Do one more question then wrap it up or one more comment?
Doree: Yeah, one more comment and then let's wrap. Why don't you choose it?
Kate: Happy New Year to you both. I resonated with many thoughts. You gals have shared the past couple of episodes. Kate teenage girls. Doree, A stressful time in life. Sending love to you both as our parasocial relationship means a lot to me. Oh, thanks. Me too. Yes. To yoga with Adrian. Excuse me. Lemme take that again. Yes. To yoga with Adrian. I'm starting tomorrow. I'll finish it in 30 days-ish. It's definitely a simple positive injection for the new year. Hang in there. My southern neighbors, your friends in Canada are hopeful for 2024.
Doree: Oh man, that's so nice.
Kate: That is a really nice message. Thank you, listener. That means a lot to us. I'm glad you're hopeful.
Doree: Me too.
Kate: I wish I would try to take some of that energy. Okay.
Doree: Okay. Kate. It says that last week my intention was to break free
Kate: Like the Queen song.
Doree: I don't remember what that is in reference to.
Kate: I don't either.
Doree: What did I want to break free from?
Kate: I want to break free. I don't know. Is it possible that's like a typo or an accidental copy paste, or do you think you wanted to break free
Doree: Kate? I'm not sure. What I can tell you is that I need to go to sleep earlier.
Kate: Okay. I have noticed that sometimes I am getting texts from you later than your normal texting timeframe. In my friendship with you, I kind of assume if I text you after nine to nine 30, I'm not going to hear from you. So when I do, I'm often, what the hell?
Doree: I feel like I've been getting into bed at 10 and then just doing a crossword or reading or doing a jigsaw puzzle on my iPad. And then I turn around and it's like 10 45 and that's too late for me.
Kate: That's too late for you. Okay.
Doree: I wake up and I'm too tired, so I need to get into bed at nine 30 I think.
Kate: Wow.
Doree: Which I am already thinking about the rest of my week, and that's not going to happen.
Kate: You have a lot of nighttime activities. You have a social life.
Doree: I now have a social life.
Kate: What is that? I don't.
Doree: Well, okay. I'll give you an example. So I didn't go out today's Wednesday. I didn't go out Monday night. I didn't go out Tuesday night.
Kate: Do you normally have things on those nights?
Doree: No. I try to limit the number of times I go out in a week. Tonight I have a tennis practice
Kate: At night.
Doree: I have a nighttime tennis practice. Tomorrow night I'm playing Mahjong with one of my Mahjong groups. And then coincidentally Friday night I'm playing Mahjong with a different group.
Kate: Keep in mind Doree also has a poker group.
Doree: And I'm playing poker on Sunday night.
Kate: I love slash am envious that you have game groups. I would love a game group.
Doree: Start a game group.
Kate: I just am so shy about starting groups.
Doree: Kate, this is a whole other conversation, but as you know, I get kind depressed around the holidays and I recently got depressed around the holidays and I was kind of moping and complaining about it to Matt and he was like, you got to reciprocate girl. He's like, why don't you have people over here? I'm like, I can't because of, he's like, we can take Bo to daycare. He was like, you're just making excuses. And I offer that to you.
Kate: Do you think, well, this is, yes. I think you're right. Do you think that you think it is making excuses? I'm afraid of what'll happen if people don't say yes or I get overwhelmed by it. I mean, this is for therapy tomorrow, but something I think about,
Doree: okay, So one thing that drives me crazy about the game nights that I do is the people who flake last minute. I really try not to flake last minute. I would say I'm one of the more consistent show uppers, and if I flake, it's for a really good reason. But I feel like so many people flake for not good reasons. And look, I'm judging, but it's often the vibe is that they just forgot to put in their calendar and something else came up and they're like, oh, I actually can't play on Friday. And they tell you this on Thursday and you're like, okay. But now that just messed up the, you know what I mean? Up game night, messed up game night. So I'm saying this to say to you, to the extent that you can, don't take it personally because it happens.
Kate: Good point.
Doree: It happens in everywhere and it's not about you and how people feel about coming to you, house people's own shit.
Kate: Good point. Okay, I'm going to take that and I'm going to sit with it. And maybe 2024 is the year I start some sort of game night.
Doree: I'm excited for you.
Kate: Well, for me, I think last week I had wrote mental health care and look, I am in a not great place with my mental health if I'm going to be honest with you and the listeners of this podcast. And it has been like that for, I would say 2023 was a really rough year for me that I'm still in, but I have a little bit more of a handle on it. And I hadn't seen my therapist in a month and a half because of the holidays. And I went to therapy last week and I was like, I think something's really wrong with me. Spoiler alert, it's the same shit. Nothing's wrong. I mean, to the extent that I'm fine, I'm okay. So I am trying to take care of my mental health better, but I got to be transparent as much as I feel comfortable being and just saying like, it's not great for me right now. It's been rough. It's been a flare up of all my mental health issues. And when that is flaring, it feels not good. On that note, another thing that isn't feeling good is my planner fasciitis in my left foot. So a few listeners, I had complained about this and a few listeners wrote in and said to wear a foot brace at night, like three listeners.
Doree: And this was something that no doctor had ever recommended.
Kate: No, this was information I had not received from
Doree: Fascinating
Kate: Anybody except Forever35 podcast listeners. So to you, I say thank you because I bought one and I was wearing it around the house for a couple hours at a time. But then I was like, you know what? I'm sleeping in this now.
Doree: Wow.
Kate: And you put your foot in it. It basically, it's ridiculous looking, but it's keeping your foot flexed. So it's stretching out the bottom of your foot and it doesn't hurt. And I have been wearing it like the last few nights to bed now. There's nothing sexier than a woman who puts on her plantar fasciitis foot brace and then her snoring mouth tape nothing. And she gets into bed.
Doree: Nothing sexier.
Kate: I mean the hotness,
Doree: It doesn't stop.
Kate: And imagine me doing that with the Rachel haircut and it will just be,
Doree: It's like Chef's kiss.
Kate: Unstoppable,
Doree: Unstoppable.
Kate: But yeah, so I am trying to, I also, I got out my old Thera gun and was rag gunning my calves.
Doree: I love a Thera gun.
Kate: So this week is all about working on that plantar fascitis, stretching.
Doree: Okay. I'm excited for you.
Kate: Rolling on a ball. Doing my exercises. Oh my gosh. Doree. We have to read our Patreon list our names.
Doree: Oh yeah.
Kate: Okay. I love doing this. I mean, talk about anxiety. I get so nervous every time.
Doree: I read them last month.
Kate: Okay, I'll do it. Okay. So look, this is something we like to do to express our most sincere gratitude for our patron subscribers at the $10 level. You Sexy Beast. So without further ado, thank you to the following people. And please as always, if you hear a mis pronunciation of your name, let us know and we'll do better next time. Alexander Houghton, Allison Cohen, Amy Mako, Andrea Sepulveda, Angie James and Rum. Becky Hobbs, Haer. Beth, Bethany, Brianne, Macy, Caroline, cc, Sheri Hyde, Christine Basses, Coco Bean, Diana, Diane, m Martin, e Jackson, Elizabeth Anderson, Elizabeth Cleary, Elizabeth Holland, Amelia, Emily, Bri, Emily McIntyre, Fran, Hannah, m Heather, Kinka, Helen De Moy. Jane Rio. JDK Del Apti. Jen. Jen, Jennifer Barrett. Jennifer Hs. Jennifer Olson, Jess Kobin, Jessica Gale, Jillian Bowman. Jillian, I feel like you and I have communicated, and I might've said your last name wrong. We'll talk Joanna Stone. Josie Alquist, Josie Sig, Julia Putt, Juliana Depeche, Juliana Duff, Kara Brugmann, Karen Perlman, Kate M, Catherine Ellingson, Katie Quatro, Kelly Dearborn, Kelsey Wolf, Denae, Carrie Golds, Kim Beagler, Kirsten Collins, Kristen Morris. Laura. Laura. Eddie. Laura had, and Lisa, Travis, Lizette, Liz Rain, Lynette Jones, M Marissa, Monica, Nick, Nikki, Bossert, Pam from Boston, Patty Dosser, Rachel Anderson, Sarah Bell, Sarah Egan, Sarah, Sarah Buzzy, Shelly Lee, Stephanie Germana, Susan Beseth, Tara, Todd, Tiffany, Griffith, Valerie Bruno. And last but never least, Zuma Lundy. Thank you all so much.
Doree: We are so grateful to you.
Kate: And thank you to everyone listening today.
Doree: Literally all of you.
Kate: Every single one of you. We really appreciate it. And we also just have to remind you that this podcast is hosted and produced by us, Doree Shafrir and Kate Spencer. It's produced and edited by Sam Junio. And Sami Reed is our project manager, and our network partner is Acast.
Doree: Thanks everybody.
Kate: Bye bye.