Listener Q&A: How We Talk About Aging

Kate and Doree learn a thing or two about skincare brands from the youths and hear from listeners about how they talk to themselves about aging, the perfect wireless bra, why Yeti Ramblers should be a household mug, and learning to let go of checking your email first/last thing.

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Transcript

Kate: Hello and welcome to Forever35, a podcast about the things we do to take care of ourselves. I'm Kate Spencer.

Doree: And I'm Doree Shafrir

Kate: And we're not experts.

Doree: We're not, we're two friends who like to talk a lot about serums.

Kate: I am being schooled by my child in skincare and I don't like it.

Doree: The tables have turned.

Kate: The tables have turned so intensely, and it's not that I don't want, I have to be clear in that I try to actively not talk about my kids on this podcast. And this is not about my child. It is more about what happens when suddenly a thing that you were kind of like a know-It-all in becomes a thing that your kid or somebody in your life is suddenly interested in. And quite frankly, she's not impressed by me. She doesn't care that I know about oils or why, because I keep being like, all you need is to wear sunscreen. You don't need that glow recipe toner. You're only like it because looks pretty and everything is a scam. And she's like, shut up. She doesn't want to hear it. Which why would you, if my mom was trying to tell me shit, I would be like, fuck off.

Doree: Yes.

Kate: But we've been doing this podcast for so long that when we started, my oldest daughter was in second grade and now she is in the middle of middle school. And so she has changed. My kids have changed so much just over the course of doing this show. And it's just really funny. Nobody has cared at all for years about what I'm doing out here with my microphone or what products I was able getting in the mail or trying. And all of a sudden she's like coming home with Glossier lip balm and I'm like, I know all about this, but she doesn't want to take advice from me because I'm her mom. She wants to take it from her friends and videos on the internet. It's just fascinating. It's really weird. I've never had this happen before. This is so interesting. Turns, turns out 12 and 13 year olds aren't into Vanicream. Doree

Doree: What? No.

Kate: Shocking.

Doree: I am shocked.

Kate: She Doesn't care.

Doree: I am shocked.

Kate: She wants to know about Drunk Elephant Glow recipie

Doree: But also you linked to a brand that she's very into called bubble

Kate: So the other day she was like, I really want to go get this moisturizer. And I was like, okay, well, and this all stuff that she has to buy with her own money, which is another speech I keep giving of like, don't blow all your money on all this shit. But again, I guess these are life lessons you have to learn. I don't know. Still, I'm still learning them. Any hoots. She came home with this moisturizer called from a line called Bubble. I'd never heard of it. And it turns out, and

Doree: You sent it to me and I was like, I've never heard of it.

Kate: No, never heard of the line. Never read a thing about it. She bought it at Target and it is a very popular skincare brand that is specifically geared towards teens and young people. And the thing she bought is called the Cloud Surf Water Cream moisturizer, which does seem really nice. I meant to go try to sneak some of it and I didn't get a chance to do it, but I will. And she also loves it because of the packaging, which I also, she's kind of like a study for me where she's like, look how cute this is. And I'm like, oh, I see.

Doree: Well, their website is so Gen Z.

Kate: Yes.

Doree: Every yes.

Kate: Yeah,

Doree: It's fascinating. I know.

Kate: The colors,

Doree: The colors, the little text circles, the font, Everything is just.

Kate: the scrolling, kind of scrolling thing.

Doree: Were your friends kind of vibe?

Kate: It's ingenious

Doree: like a copy.

Kate: Yeah.

Doree: And you linked to an article about the founder who's 21, who was 21 I think when she started it.

Kate: I believe she's 30 now and was a teen when she started her first business. I got a little muddled reading this.

Doree: I see, okay. Okay.

Kate: I think this skincare line launched in 2020, so she wasn't that young when she launched it, but she's been an entrepreneur for over a decade and she's 30.

Doree: I mean like, okay.

Kate: Yeah, kudos. And I actually really love that I learned about this new skincare line from her that felt really kind of exciting to me that we now have this, it's like we're in a new phase of our relationship, but you're right, it's called New School Skincare. In an old school skincare world. We searched for amazing products, made specifically for youthful skin and found nothing. And I was kind of like, oh God. Well, number one, I don't think that's true. But number two is all skincare being marketed to US olds.

Doree: Well, it's just interesting to me after we had that whole conversation with Marissa Meltzer about Glossier and this company is going for, I don't think Glossier Glossier wasn't going after teens. Glossier was going after women in their twenties. And it's very interesting that this woman really honed in on the teens

Kate: Who want to spend money, as I have seen with my kid.

Doree: Yes. Who want to spend money.

Kate: They want this stuff.

Doree: Right. Well, and also the products are not reinventing the wheel. It's all, it's kind of the same shit, but it just goes to show, and Glossier did this perfectly as well when we were talking about how the balm.com is rebranded Vaseline copy a brand story and packaging go a really long way,

Kate: Really long Doree. To the point where I'm still fooled by all of it. It's not like it works on all of us no matter how aware we are. And it's also was funny to me because when we were kids, and I think we've noticed this in exploring past brands and looking at old marketing and old commercials of skincare brands, they've always been selling skincare to teens. And there's always and young people that's not new.

Doree: Totally.

Kate: But it's so interesting how for us it was kind of be ashamed of your face or use this and you won't be, and this is just so geared toward a completely different generation. We were also sizzling our face off with witch hazel, and I'm thinking of Sea Breeze specifically. were just cooking our faces.

Doree: You're right. And there's much less focus on flaws and more about enhancing your natural beauty

Kate: And caring for yourself

Doree: And caring for yourself and caring for your skin and mental health. The whole thing about mental health on their website, Clinique was not talking about mental health in 1987.

Kate: They were all wearing lab coats like doctors.

Doree: Totally

Kate: with the makeup counter. Also, one thing that my kids talk about a lot that is really intriguing to me is the aesthetic of things. They're obsessed with aesthetic, how a thing looks, if it's cute, if it's pretty and not themselves, their product, their things, and do you like the aesthetic of this shelf in my room? And they're so visually oriented, I think because of the ways in which they're being raised to perform life online. And again, we have a lot of boundaries set up in our family for that stuff, as I know many other people do. And it doesn't matter. It still reaches them and it's just a part of the culture. This is how they all talk. And it's just interesting to me to notice them noticing the aesthetic of a product. I don't really remember. I remember being turned on by the Clinique three-step bottles not turned on in that way of like, Ooh, that looks titillating and exciting and special. But I don't remember looking at a Sea Breeze bottle and being like, Ooh.

Doree: No. Because that wasn't the focus. It didn't matter.

Kate: Right.

Doree: You weren't posting your products on social media. Didn't matter if the packaging looked cute, it was more about the results. I'm just thinking about the, was it the old Stridex pads commercials or it was talking about getting rid of your acne for boys, essentially?

Kate: Yeah, all of them did that.

Doree: Yeah. That is not the focus here whatsoever.

Kate: No. Now is there an undercurrent of that? I would assume so because we're still existing in a patriarchy. Right. So that's still got to be, that language has to, I'm sure is woven in. If it's not in marketing and advertising, they have to be picking it up elsewhere.

Doree: Sure.

Kate: But yes, you're right. It's not as direct. I mean, this is such a sweet little website. I'm really enjoying learning about Bubble Skincare community. Puts the You in Bubble. I mean, yes, I'm on board. Bubble Away. Anyway, the fact that I had never heard of this means there's so many other brands I've never heard of. That was the other thing.

Doree: Totally.

Kate: There's a world out there I don't know about.

Doree: Yes.

Kate: And that feels a little scary sometimes.

Doree: Yeah. Well, yeah. It's just like this is not targeted to us. When I looked at Bubble's, Instagram only had, there were only two people I follow who follow Bubble.

Kate: Oh, Interesting.

Doree: And one of them, one of them is she works at Teen Vogue, so that's not that surprising.

Kate: She's captain.

Doree: Yeah. The other is the older influencer, honey. Good. I don't know who, do you follow her?

Kate: Oh, I do know who that is. She, she's like an Gerian or Sep Arian.

Doree: Yes. So I thought that was interesting that she follows her, she follows Bubble, but none of my other mutuals, you know what I mean? No one else follows bubble. Whereas if I go to, let's see what happens if I go to Glossier, I'm just testing out a theory here, 117 people that I follow follow Glossier and two that I follow, follow Bubble.

Kate: This is fascinating.

Doree: And I think my followers and the people I follow on Instagram, probably heavily skew millennial

Kate: Totes.

Doree: So, and yes, Glossier has more followers altogether than Bubble. They have about six times, seven times as many followers. But if the proportions were the same, then I would have 14 followers and I have 117. You know what I mean? So it's like my following, the people I follow are Overindexing on Glossier and way under indexing on Bubble.

Kate: Well, just for the sake of the conversation, I went over to the CeraVe Instagram and only seven people, I follow it. But then the pinned post is Charlie Delio, she's a brand ambassador for CeraVe apparently.

Doree: Well, I feel like that's partner because CeraVe is big in the TikTok generation, but to people our age, CeraVe was just like in the same mom used it world as Cetaphil. You know what I mean? It's like an old brand to us.

Kate: So interesting.

Doree: So I don't know. It is interesting.

Kate: Well, that's what's new over here

Doree: It is interesting

Kate: In my bubble.

Doree: Oh, I see what you did there.

Kate: Sorry,

Doree: Kate. Okay.

Kate: Couldn't help it.

Doree: Well, Kate, this is kind of like an old, what we used to call a mini episode.

Kate: That's true.

Doree: But we now call a Q and A episode. We're doing these about twice a month on the main feed. We still love to get your questions. You can email or text those or call us. Our email is Forever35podcast@gmail.com. You can call or text us at (781) 591-0390. As always, everything we mention is on our website Forever35podcast.com. We are on Instagram @Forever35podcast. I'm curious how many of the people Forever35 podcasts follows, also follow Bubble. We'll have to do that experiment. You can also join our Patreon where we have tons of bonus content. We are doing our little spinoff podcast season one where we're going deep on the oc. We posted the full episode for everyone a couple of weeks ago. So if you're season one Curious, you can check that out. There's also a free trial on Patreon, so you can check us out for seven days, no obligation as they say. And we have a newsletter at Forever35,podcast.com/newsletter.

Kate: May I just ask, if you use Bubble, will you let us know what your faves are?

Doree: Yeah, I'm curious. Very.

Kate: I'm going to assume that folks with mature skin can also use bubble even though it's not marketed toward us. So anybody out there bubbling, please give us the scoop.

Doree: Please let us know how you bubble.

Kate: Alright, we're going to take a break and we'll be right back.

Doree: Alright, Let's take a break. BRB. All right, we're back.

Kate: You know what, I did want to mention our giving circle before we get into hearing.

Doree: Oh yes. Thank you, Kate.

Kate: From some folks. We have been raising money with our Giving Circle through these states project project for local races in Virginia. Look, if you do not live in Virginia, if you do live in Virginia, anybody can donate. But shit is real in Virginia. There are very slim margins of power that will be decided in these local elections in the house. We need to flip three seats to take back the majority in the Senate. We can only lose one seat to keep the majority. As you know, abortion is becoming less and less protected around America, and Virginia is the last state in the South with abortion protections. These elections decide massive, massive things. So please, if you are inclined, we will be raising money for the next weeks leading up to the next election. You can donate any amount is so crucial in helping on this level. So we will include a link to our giving circle. You all have been so generous with your donations and they have really made a difference. So we thank you for supporting our Giving circle and we look forward to everything that the States project is doing on the ground in these pivotal states and elections.

Doree: If you want to read more about the States project, there was a great profile of them in the New York Times a couple of weeks ago.

Kate: So good. Yeah, we can link the debt as well in the show notes. Okay, so switching gears a question about aging. Someone asked us, how do you both talk to yourselves about getting older? I know you've touched on this off and on over the years, but I'm wondering if there's anything you've been telling yourselves lately about the growing older slash aging process.

Doree: I mean,

Kate: Where to begin?

Doree: Yeah,

Kate: I'm trying to think of where I even start with my feelings about aging.

Doree: Where do you start, Kate?

Kate: Well, I don't know because I think so often it's a superficial conversation of like, are we getting Botox our skins again? And not that that's not something I think about all the time. Again, I've talked about, I feel like my face is starting to droop, which is what happens when you age and making peace with that slash going down the rabbit hole of watching derm surgeons on YouTube talking about what you can do, just this kind of fucking rabbit hole. But then there's also, aging is so much more than just the exterior. It's about our place in society. It's about our health, menopause, terminal illness, chronic illness. I've been grieving the fact that I'm getting older and my daughters are growing up in a world where they are having less and less access to reproductive rights and care and just, there's so many layers. I don't even quite know where to begin. I'm assuming this listener's talking about the physical process of growing older and aging, but again, as a person who is, I think in perimenopause, it is fucking gnarly. And I think the internal stuff impacts my emotions and how I feel about myself and just everything. I don't know. I'm all over the place. What about you? Is there anything that you've been kind of thinking about or I don't know, your inner monologue or outer monologue about aging?

Doree: Well, Not to be all kids say the darnedest things, but they do. But I would like to share something that Henry said this morning, which was Mama who's the oldest person on earth. And I said, I don't know bud. Who do you think it is? And he thought for a minute. And then he said, Saba, which is what he calls my dad, his grandfather, it's Hebrew for grandfather. And he's like, he's 78 because he's 78. Oh buddy. And I was like, yeah, I was thinking he probably is the oldest person Henry knows. Henry knows. But I've just been thinking about people in my life who probably won't get to be 78. And then I'm like, I mean my dad's parents didn't live to 78. His dad died when he was 50. And so It's funny, I texted it to my mom and dad and I think my mom, my mom, she's a little technologically challenged. I don't think she realized it was a group text and she responded, oh, don't tell him.

Kate: Oh No.

Doree: And my dad's response was like, true, that's true and correct. And then he did sunglasses emoji and I was like, yeah, he gets it. I feel like my mom was projecting her own anxieties about aging, But it's like, yeah, it's a privilege to get to be 78 and I don't want to sound all like aging is a privilege, none of this bothers me because that's obviously not true. But I think I am trying to sort of keep that in the back of my head.

Kate: Yeah, for sure. I mean, I agree with you and I think about that a lot in terms of my mom died when she was 57 and I'm coming up on the anniversary of a friend who passed away before she ever turned 40. And I think about her all the time and just how I'm still ticking along and she never that. And I agree that is I think we hold space for both a privilege to get older.

Doree: Totally.

Kate: The other thing, the thing I have been feeling a little bit is the thing you hear from people about how you get invisible to other people when you age. I'm starting to understand that in a way that I didn't in my thirties, and I think this is when I do feel like being in my mid forties, my perspective is so different than five years ago.

Doree: Totally.

Kate: And the other thing that I will say is I am trying to take better care of myself because I am starting to worry more about my health and getting older, and so I'm trying to get better sleep and reduce stress and things like focus on my emotional wellbeing and stuff like that because I do think that really does play a large part in how we age. I don't know. It's such a deep conversation and I am having hot flashes I think, which I don't like.

Doree: Of course I mean there's a lot that's shitty about aging. Also, the algorithm on TikTok has been showing me some toss about aging Lately, And one of them that I saw was from someone who was like, I think she was a doctor or a nurse, and she was like, people assume that they're going to live a long life and they're going to be healthy until they die. Well, I got news for you, you might be sick for years. And I was just like, oh God, God. Yeah. And this is kind of in the both things can be true. Thing that you were just saying is like, yes, it is a privilege to get old, but also your life as an older person is not going to look the same as your life as a younger person, even if you are healthy

Kate: That so hard to square. I think that is the hardest part about getting older at any age is that you never truly mentally feel your age.

Doree: Right.

Kate: And how upsetting that can be.

Doree: Yeah. I start to feel my age when I'm around younger people.

Kate: In what way? They're using slang you don't know or just they're going out late or just they're waiting. The world they grew up in is different.

Doree: They just have a different outlook than I do. And that comes across in conversations. I feel like my lower limit, and this is partly because I have a lot of mom, I have quite a few mom friends who are almost exactly 10 years younger than me. It's like I'm on delayed timeline. And I do think that for the most part, we do have a lot in common. We obviously have a lot in common because of our kids, but occasionally someone will say something and I'll be like, oh yeah, they're younger than me. Then I feel like I can't go younger than that. If there was a mom who was 30, I would be like, it's just a bridge too far.

Kate: That's a 16 year age gap.

Doree: That's a 16 year age gap

Kate: That mom could technically be your child.

Doree: Yes, easily. Or sometimes if I have, I don't know, a meeting, a business meeting or something, and someone is a decision maker at their company and I Google them and I find their LinkedIn and it's like graduated college in 2018, and I'm like,

Kate: I know. I know

Doree: God.

Kate: And there's a feeling of like, oh shit, my ship has sailed and I don't believe that. I don't believe that, and I certainly don't believe it when I'm talking to other people, but often the way I feel towards others and the way I feel toward myself are very different.

Doree: Yeah, Totally.

Kate: And that is sometimes I'll be talking as a writer, I'll be talking about other romance authors and then I realize they're like 28 and they've written five books and I'm like, oh shit. Fucking 45 over here or not? Not yet. I keep saying I'm 45. I think I'm just 44. Am I 45? No, I'm 44. 1979.

Doree: Your 44.

Kate: I'm 44. Thank You.

Doree: You're 44.

Kate: That's the other thing I'm starting to get muddled.

Doree: Yeah. Yeah.

Kate: I don't know. I need reading glasses. My feet hurt. It's all happening over here. Also, what's what's going to kill us all? Doree?

Doree: What

Kate: sitting. Sitting is so bad for us? And we spoke with, we just interviewed Jane Marie for an upcoming episode of the pod, but in the episode of the Dream, I hear her say that. She said this in conversation on an episode, and I was like, oh God, you're so right. My body hurts so much and it's because I sit all freaking day.

Doree: Yeah,

Kate: Chairs. Chairs.

Doree: But didn't you just get it? You got, You just got a walking pad.

Kate: I did. I haven't talked about that on this podcast yet because it is certainly an impulse buy. But I did get a walking pad, but I can't walk and record this podcast and I cant.

Doree: No, you can't. You can't.

Kate: I got it for mornings, nighttime when I don't feel comfortable being outside and also editing audio or we're playing an email or having to watch something. I figured why not buy this? It was 150 bucks, buy this walking pad and try it out. I've used it a couple times.

Doree: Okay, all right.

Kate: We'll check. But I am trying to sit less because yeah, it's not feeling great. Okay, moving on. Great question. Okay. Someone asked us specifically to me, but I actually think you could weigh in on this as well. They wrote to us, I am adventuring into wireless brass for my double Ds, but they all give me a unibo, which then becomes home to gross accumulations of sweat. Have you found a wireless bra that can keep the girls apart or a solution for sweaty uniboob? Okay. I have not used full body deodorant, but that might be something to look into.

Doree: Oh, that's interesting.

Kate: But I've not used it and I don't know. I think that's more for odor than it is for sweat. I have tried a bevy of wireless bras. What I can do is I can share them here. I can also put together on our shop, my page, I can put together this list of bras that I've tried with kind of my thoughts and link out to them, and that would be with an affiliate link. Full disclosure. Now I want to say my favorite one came from a past sponsor of Forever35 called Honey Love.

Doree: I'm wearing a honey love bra.

Kate: Oh shut the front door. Is it the crossover bra?

Doree: Yes, I'm wearing the crossover bra.

Kate: Okay. That is my favorite one. And I think with a wireless bra, when you have big knockers, it's not easy to check all the boxes. Comfort, support.

Doree: Yes, I agree.

Kate: Support And definition I think are kind of the three things we're looking for with a wireless, with a bra. So I've tried the All-in-one bra from Spanx. I didn't love it. I've tried skims naked Scoop bra, which is very comfortable, but not very supportive. Nix has a bra that I've tried, I think it's called the v-neck bra.I like that one. I've tried Behave Bras, wireless lounge bra, which they were on Shark Tank apparently.

Doree: Oh, okay.

Kate: That is a nice, I like that one. It's supportive and it's defining, but the material is not smooth. What's it called? It's like Lacey.

Doree: Oh, okay, sure, sure, sure.

Kate: Then recently I got the ritual bra from Athleta. Don't like it. Don't like it. And while I was on a plane, the strap popped out. It has adjustable straps that you can unhook and change to a crossback or what's it called? Crossback? Is that what it's called? You X the bra on the back

Doree: Yeah, you can crisscross the

Kate: Crisscross, but the strap popped off, so I didn't like that. So shockingly, I found this honey love one to be super comfortable. It gives me boob shape because I know what you mean about the unibo, and I find this one to be shapey, And It holds me up in a way that doesn't let me feel like I'm just flopping over. My boobs are spilling out like Niagara Falls. That is the worst feeling. I don't like that feeling. Some people okay with it. I want to be duct taped in.

Doree: So I obviously really like the honey love. I do feel like it got a little bit stretched out, but I tightened up the straps and that seemed to help. That seemed to do the trick. So we're good. Me and Honey love. We're good now.

Kate: You're good. Our code, if you go to honey love.com/forever, you can get 20% off. And I really like this bra. I don't believe they're currently advertising on the show. This is not a spawn con or anything. It's just this is the one that worked best for me and Doree's wearing it right now. That's quite,

Doree: and I'm wearing it right now.

Kate: Endorsement an en-Doree-sement

Doree: An en-Doree-sement.

Kate: Are there any other wireless brass that you've tried and loved? Has that ever, or are you a wire only type of babe?

Doree: I used to be a wire only type of person, but I was really looking for a wireless bra because the wire bras were starting to feel uncomfortable.

Kate: Yeah, I know. And I know that boob sweat. I wonder if a little bit of powder would help.

Doree: Oh yeah. Maybe

Kate: Some boob powder.

Doree: Maybe some boob powder

Kate: Like Goldbond.

Doree: Interesting. Interesting. Interesting idea, Kate.

Kate: People power up their butts. Men are always powdering up their genitals.

Doree: That is very true. Thank you for reminding us.

Kate: Sorry for that visual, but oh my God. Yeah. Let's be powdering up our boobs.

Doree: Let's powder our boobs. Everybody

Kate: equity in the powder space.

Doree: Okay. All right.

Kate: We've got, I think we have time for what, one more, two more questions. What do you think? No, two more at least.

Doree: Sure. Okay. We have a voicemail on a completely different topic. Shall we hear it?

Kate: Oh my gosh, yes. Yes. But specifically because this pertains to my number one interest, which is mugs.

Voicemail: I literally had my first pause, the pod I have to call in now moment. I've been listening to you guys for a long time, but you are going on in this latest episode about the Yeti Rambler with the 360 degree drinking experience. And I have that one. I love that one. And I have literally told friends of mine, this is a game changer for water consumption. I don't know what it is, but it is a great drinking experience because you can pick it up and its dishwasher safe and it's the stainless piece, but then the top is easily washable. There's no straws to deal with. It's really, really nice. So I'm in no way affiliated with Yeti. I bought it at a store in the Twin Cities. Mine is a lovely coral color, but I absolutely love it and it's my favorite. Go get it if you want it, if you need it. Bye.

Doree: Wow. Okay.

Kate: So I bought this Yeti Rambler 18 ounce hotshot bottle with this hotshot cap, and I love this thing, and I hardly endorse it as a travel coffee mug, it's great. You twist off the cap to a certain point and it opens things up and you can drink out of it like a cup, and then you can twist it back up when you want it to be closed. And it just is very easy and safe. And it does have a full 360 degree or 360 drinking experience. It's a great product. I love it.

Doree: You love it.

Kate: Yeah. I kind of want to get the tiny one because sometimes the 18 ounce feels kind of large for the amount of coffee I'm drinking. Oh, interesting. Okay. Do I need two Yeti to drink coffee out of? Definitely not. So I haven't done it, but I really like it. And you're the original Yeti Water drinker,

Doree: am I?

Kate: Yes. You have that Yeti that you held up. You have a straw, you have a Yeti.

Doree: Oh yeah. I drink iced coffee out of this Yeti.

Kate: Yeah. You like that thing?

Doree: I do.

Kate: There she goes.

Doree: I mean you were the original Hydroflask with a straw person.

Kate: Yeah. I love mean drinking too much. Water is not a problem for me. The problem is, wait, no, it is a problem because I have to pee a lot, especially on planes, but I'm not dehydrated.

Doree: You're definitely not dehydrated.

Kate: No, I'm overly into it. Alright,

Doree: We're going to take a break and we'll be right back. Okay, we're back.

Kate: Someone texted us and they said, I have also recently discovered the joy of not checking email first thing or last thing. Actually, our phones are made to be addictive, so I use an external commitment mechanism, the Freedom app, which you might have mentioned before. I schedule a daily downtime from 9:00 PM until 8:00 AM That turns my phone into call and text only feels great with numerous a. I have the Freedom app, I also have something called opal.

Doree: Okay. Okay.

Kate: I have tried iterations of this and I do think that this helps. And I will say I have not been great about not checking email first thing. I certainly am still, but I am hoping to kind of recalibrate and retention in that area.

Doree: I look at my email when I pick up my phone in the morning, but I still don't sleep with my phone in the bedroom.

Kate: So amazing.

Doree: But I do have my phone on Do Not disturb until 9:00 AM

Kate: Tell me more about this.

Doree: And that is partly because I am usually the one getting up with Henry in the morning. He likes to play in the morning. We have a whole morning routine that we do almost every morning and then I take him to school and it's like I don't want to be constant. I don't want my phone. I have some group texts. I think especially the group texts where some people are on the East coast that people decide that 7 45 in the morning is the best time to be blowing up my phone.

Kate: Or sometimes it's five forty five in the morning when you've got East Coasters for sure.

Doree: Which fine. But I am trying to give Henry my undivided attention. There's a lot of talk in the preschool community about really making sure you make time for that connection with your child. And especially since I only have one child, I can really do that. I can really focus on him and let him kind of drive what we're doing in the morning.

Kate: That's so nice.

Doree: And feel like I want him to feel like his cup is full before we go to school.

Kate: You're so nice.

Doree: So we do some snuggling, we play some chess, we eat breakfast together. He plays iPad games while I get dressed. We walk the dog. We have a whole thing.

Kate: That's A lot. That's a lot you're doing too.

Doree: It's a lot. And so I don't need to be checking my phone and responding to texts every five seconds. I will look periodically to see what's going on, but I do try not to respond and not to be in my phone unless it is very urgent, which I will say 99% of the time, it's not

Kate: Never, never is rarely.

Doree: So that is my sort of, and my email is not, I don't get notifications for new emails on my phone ever. That's just a thing that I have that set, but the do not disturb until 9:00 AM I do find to be quite effective.

Kate: Okay. I might play around with that. I love that.

Doree: So that's just my little good hack. That's what works for me.

Kate: I like it. Doree good. I think that's a good trick and probably good for me to implement that at night because night is kind of like, well

Doree: yeah, my do not disturb goes on at 10, which I feel like is reasonable.

Kate: Totally. Alright, Well, I mean, based on this conversation that we've had today, I could come up with a million intentions, but my intention for this week, well, I guess my intention for last week was to tap back into my beating hobby, but I haven't had time to do that, so I'll carry that over this week. I just need to collapse. I just need to give myself space to crumble and do nothing for a little bit. Not like a bad way, but just to sit, not multitask, not be folding laundry while I sit and watch tv, but just to kind of sit for a minute. I know I, I said sitting is bad, so maybe I'll be laying on the ground with my legs up on the couch, but I need a moment to just take a beat because I've been going really hard for a while and I'm, I'm not even sure what's up and what's down. Yeah. So that's where I'm at. How is your baby clothing purge of Palooza from last week?

Doree: It has been going really well. I ended up giving away a couple bags of stuff in my local Buy Nothing group, and I got a really nice message yesterday from the guy I gave the stuff to.

Kate: I'll just read it.

Doree: Yes.

Kate: That's so nice.

Doree: He said, I just wanted to thank you for my wife and I again, for all the clothes. There's some really lovely stuff in there, smiley face, and I said, you're so welcome. A lot of it was handed down to us, so I just wanted to pay it forward, which is true. But yeah, I was just like, just get it out. Get it out. Get it out. I still have some stuff, but there's a couple bags that I know I'm giving to a friend that I'm seeing on Wednesday. Some of the stuff is spoken for. I think I mentioned I mailed some stuff to a friend, so it's happening now. I'm going to switch gears and try to get rid of some stuff in my closet because that's just an ongoing thing. That is a nightmare. But anyway, this week I am trying to find a get rich quick scheme.

Kate: Seriously though. Yes, you are.

Doree: Yeah, that's what I'm trying to do this week.

Kate: Do you have any leads?

Doree: Nope. Nope. No, I don't.

Kate: I feel like I watch a lot of videos about this online and every time I'm like, am I going to start exploring? Am I going to take this course in passive income? That's probably a scam.

Doree: Am I going to start drop shipping?

Kate: Yeah. Truly Doree, I've had that thought recently.

Doree: Digital downloads on Etsy. No, I'm fully in slight panic mode about money, and so I am now like, okay, what do I do? So I'm going to try to figure that out this week. That's my impression.

Kate: So send all get Rich quick schemes,

Doree: please send all pyramid schemes, all get rich quick schemes, all leads on dubious business investments. Send them my way to Forever35podcast@gmail.com so Kate can vet them also.

Kate: I don't know. Or I'm going to be like, I'll do this again. Like I said, I have fully started watching videos about that topic

Doree: And that's when Forever35 became a podcast about entrepreneurs. Okay. I have probably offended way too many people on this episode, so I'm just going to say Forever35 is hosted and produced by me. Doree Shafrir and Kate Spencer, are produced and edited by Sam Junio. Sami Reed is our project manager, and our Erstwhile Network partner is Acast. Thanks everyone for listening. We'll talk to you soon.

Kate: Bye

Doree: bye.