Kate nibbles on a little chocolate while Doree considers resurrecting her signature bangs. Then, listeners wonder if anyone else has inventoried their entire house and what it really means to wash your hair once a week. Plus, they get a near-perfect food swap suggestion. 

Activity of the Week: scrub yourselves, please!!!! 

 Mentioned in this Episode

• Pre-order a signed/personalized copy Kate’s new book, IN A NEW YORK MINUTE

• Click here for tickets to Kate’s book signing in LA!

• Korean spa scrubbing glove

• Klure Supreme Seed

• Necessaire Body Exfoliator

• Vegamour Shampoo

  • use code FOREVER35 to save 20% on your first order!

• 100 Senses The Full Body Float Duo

Click here to shop all of Forever35's Amazon recs.

To leave a voicemail or text for a future episode, reach them at 781-591-0390. You can also email the podcast at forever35podcast@gmail.com.

Visit forever35podcast.com for links to everything they mention on the show.

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Transcript

Kate: Hello, and welcome to forever 35, a podcast about the things we do to take care of ourselves. I'm Kate. Spencer

Doree: Am. I am Doree Shafrir.

Kate: That's true. And we are not experts.

Doree: No, but we are two friends who like to talk a lot about serums.

Kate: And this is a mini episode where we hear from you. We share your comments and thoughts, and we answer your questions to the best of our ability.

Doree: And please do remember we are not experts. We're podcast hosts. We always encourage you to seek support first and foremost, from a medical and or mental health professional as needed. And

Kate: If you would like to reach us, our voicemail number is 7 8 1 5 9 1 0 3 9 0. And our email is forever 35 podcast, gmail.com. You can also text us questions, comments at such a raw at that voicemail number.

Doree: Eggplant emoji.

Kate: We get so many now it's like become a thing.

Doree: Um, please do visit our website forever35podcast.com. We have links there for everything you mentioned on the show. Just click on the episodes tab, and then you'll see the latest episode. We also have transcripts up there. I mean, our website is just getting crazy.

Kate: Poppin'.

Doree: You can follow us on Twitter at forever 35 pod on Instagram at February 35 podcast. Join the forever 35 Facebook group at facebook.com/groups/forever35podcast. The password is serums and do sign up for our newsletter at forever35podcast.com/newsletter.

Kate: Oh baby. What a day,

Doree: Oh Baby! Yeah.

Kate: Oh, you know what? I have to be plugging my book promo stuff. I gotta get better at this.

Doree: Okay. Let's hear it.

Kate: Friends, you can. Pre-order a signed copy of my book. I will include links either from Romans in Pasadena, California, or the ripped bodice and call of our city, California, to amazing independent bookstores. And I will be doing a live event at the ripped bodice at 8:00 PM on March 12th. Links to all of this will be in our show notes. There will be more events coming up to discuss, but that's still all being hashed out and Dori. Listen, my book comes out March 15th. It's called in a New York minute. Bye. Love it. I appreciate your support.

Doree: Kate, do you have something in your mouth?

Kate: Oh. I did. I took a bite of chocolate when I forgot we were podcasting. I like didn't think about it.

Doree: <laughs>

Kate: I'm so sorry.

Doree: It's okay.

Kate: I honestly kind of forgot that this was like a professional moment. I just was like, we're chatting. I

Doree: Was like, does she have a cough drop in her mouth? What is happening?

Kate: No, she has a piece of chocolate love exo exo X peppermint in dark chocolate. That's what I'm. It's very good. I keep dark chocolate at my desk to power through the late night, so,

Doree: oh, that's smart.

Kate: Oh my goodness. Sorry about that.

Doree: That's okay. Um,

Kate: Look that just speaks to the conversational nature of this podcast. That after that we were doing a podcast.

Doree: Yeah. Well, here we are. Anyway. Yes. Pre-order Kate's book. It is such a delight.

Kate: Also Doree there are like a few Easter forever35 Easter eggs worked into the book.

Doree: What?

Kate: Yeah, I'm doing it in the new book that I'm writing too. I, I drop like little things that I'm like, I hope a forever 35 listener picks up on this.

Doree: Wow. I hope I pick up on it.

Kate: It's not like very exciting. I'm not know. I'm not like hashtag Dory's hotel in the middle of the book, but I do feel like there's some things where the people will be like, oh, Kate wrote this with us in mind.

Doree: What if they went on a trip and the name of the hotel was Doree's hotel.

Kate: Doree.

Doree: Yes. Kate,

Kate: We need to talk.

Doree: Okay. Let's talk. Let's talk

Kate: Because the first line here in our document that you have written,

Doree: Oh gosh. Yes.

Kate: Is I'm thinking about resurrecting my bangs.

Doree: Okay. Listen, this is not something that I take lightly. I just want you to know that, but I don't know. I just, you know, I've I had bangs for most of my life. Like I, you know, me without bangs is like not mm It's not. It's different for most. Yeah. I mean, I, I went, I definitely went through phases where I didn't have bangs, but like I also had a lot of bangs

Kate: When I met you. Like when we first became friends, you had bangs and then we were friends throughout your growing out process.

Doree: Right. Well, so I, I definitely had like, so I swept bangs for way longer than I should have.

Kate: I don't know. I kinda feel like those are timelessly cool.

Doree: Are they?

Kate: I think so. No, you don't think so.

Doree: I don't know, but like anyway, point is I, like, I went through a lot of trouble to grow them out because like, as every knows, growing up bangs is such a pain they're like in that horrible in between phase for so long.

Kate: I haven't had bangs since the first grade.

Doree: Wow. Okay. Well, I, I had, I had bangs for a long time, so I

Kate: Had like fake banks where I would like cut some layer, but not you did, you had a true bang. You've had true bangs.

Doree: I've had true bangs. Yeah. True bangs. Um, so yeah, so I, I don't know. I think, I think part of it is that I'm kind of bored.

Kate: Yeah. I know. Totally

Doree: With just like E everything.

Kate: Yeah.

Doree: Gesturing, gesturing. Um, but like, so that I think is part of it and I, I don't know. I think I just need a change and maybe bangs are the way to go.

Kate: I gonna be honest. I support you. Cut bangs if you want cut bangs.

Doree: Okay. All right. Okay.

Kate: Just life is short. Do what you want. You

Doree: Know? Yeah. Someone, I saw someone posted, um, a picture of someone with a cool haircut with bangs and see, this is also the problem. I like see this picture. And then I'm like, Ooh, that would be a cool haircut to have. But like, my hair probably wouldn't do this. And also this woman is like gorgeous. So it's

Kate: Tell yourself short here, Dory. Come on. Here's

Doree: I just, I just texted you the picture.

Kate: Okay. Hold on. Let's see if it's coming. Doree section. Oh, okay. This woman is a model

Doree: That thank you. Oh,

Kate: This would be fun. So this is interesting though. This is a longer, you would keep your hair long, but with a bang, it

Doree: Would keep my hair long, but with a bang and a kind of like layered sort a little bit more layered cut. Now here's the other problem that I feel like I've run into, which is that I'll find these haircuts that I'm like, oh, that's the perfect haircut. But like, the person actually has like much thicker hair than I do.

Kate: I know.

Doree: And so on my hair, this might just look sort of limp and bad. That's my other concern.

Kate: Well, again, with hair, the only way you're going to truly know is if you just get the haircut and if it's, I never feel like gets truly so bad that it's, that you can't handle it for a few months. You know? I feel like you can, if it's like the worst haircut you've ever gotten in your life, you'll be able to pin the bang. You'll you'll be able to solve it. And what if it's the best haircut you've ever gotten in your whole life, then you got it.

Doree: Well, you know, I'm seeing my, the woman who cuts my hair, I'm seeing her next week. I'm going to propose this and just get her feedback if she's like, I really don't think you should do that. Then I'm gonna listen to her.

Kate: Yeah. She is an expert.

Doree: Yeah. So, and I'm not, as discussed. Now, Kate, I feel like you are becoming a shower expert.

Kate: Okay. Listen. Great segue, Doree. I really love how you handled that so much.

Doree: Thank you.

Kate: I had a moment yesterday where I was like, I need to shower and I need to scrub my skin off my body. I was inspired by the listener conversation that we had, uh, about what we use to wash our bodies in the shower. Now we've received an outpouring of responses that I have not had time to like accumulate into one document, but I will, but there was great suggestion of like, you know, Korean spa scrubbing gloves. So I ordered some, they arrived and yesterday I went for it. Now I wanted to take a bath, but there just wasn't time. So I was like, we're doing shower. And I went for like a full shower spa situation.

Doree: Yes.

Kate: I double shampooed my hair, which I never do.

Doree: Whoa. Oh, okay.

Kate: I washed myself from head to toe. I then shaved. I, I can't remember what order I did if I scrubbed or shaved, but I scrubbed and shaved. And let me tell you, I was scrubbing so hard with those gloves.

Doree: Whoa.

Kate: It wasn't, you know, obviously nowhere, like if you get it done professionally, but it worked enough. Then I did like a spotty scrub. Then I got out of the shower and I did my favorite face mask from Klure. It's called Supreme seed. I just needed, like, I just needed to be clean. I, I don't know how to describe what I was feeling. I just needed to like scrub myself from head to toe and it felt great. I used, um, Necessaire makes a really great body exfoliant for the shower. I used that and I washed my face of course. And uh, love. I used my sponsored. Vegamour shampoo, which I quite fancy. Wow. That was it. Yeah. And yeah, I needed just, I don't know. My skin was like piling up on my body. I looked, I had like a snake skin

Doree: Now, how did you feel when you got out?

Kate: Amazing. I felt amazing. Oh. And then of course I, you know, lubricated myself with some VRE body cream. So I, then I,

Doree: You know, Ooh, some nice thick van cream.

Kate: That's right. Doree. I moistened myself up. I just got nice and greasy and then I just put on my clothes and went about my day, but I just, I needed it. I, I truly, I've also been very tired, you know, we're like potty training our dog and she keeps us up at night. And so I just have felt a little like, and I'm also on a deadline. I, I just have a lot kind of emotionally and professionally going on. So I just felt like it was very grounding to kind of just scrub myself.

Doree: Oh, that sounds so nice.

Kate: It was really nice. It was needed. Um, I would like to do it, it in a bath. I would love, I need to take a bath. I haven't gotten around to a bath. Before we take a break, can you just run by our listeners, this bath tool that you're trying tonight?

Doree: Yes,

Kate: Because this is a lot.

Doree: Okay. I want to preface this by saying, but I have not yet actually tried this,

Kate: So it's not endorsed yet by the so it's,

Doree: I just wanna wanna be clear, but I did feel like I needed to share this, so, okay. I basically, like I got, I got targeted.

Kate: I love a targeted ad that works, you know, you're like, wow, the metaverse is real.

Doree: Yeah. The metaverse was very real. I was on Facebook as one does. And there was an ad for this company called A Hundred Senses. And it was for this thing, this like floaty thing in the bath and I was like, okay, wait, actually, this looks really cool. And what I, what I often like to do on targeted ads is click through to see the comments. Because actually a lot of times the comments on targeted ads are very negative

Kate: Interest. Interesting.

Doree: They don't like the companies like won't don't delete them or so something. And so sometimes like, you'll see people be like, this sucks or whatever, but people seemed very enthusiastic about this. And I was like, Hmm, well, I don't know. Maybe they deleted all the negative comments, but still then I went to the website and I was like, okay, this looks really cool. So this is what it is. It is an inflatable pillow that you put behind your neck and head. And then there's like a bolster, an inflatable bolster for your knees that goes under your knees.

Kate: So you felt like bathtub pool toys, basically.

Doree: Supposedly this gives you the sensation of feeling like you are floating. Ooh, It's supposed to be very relaxing. Now this company also sells very overpriced in my opinion, um, like bubble bath and other kind of aromatherapy seeming stuff that I did not purchase. I only bought the, the, the pillow bolster thing. Okay. A full it's called the full body float duo.

Kate: You have to text me after you do this tonight,

Doree: The head they experience a deeper, more relaxing soak in any bathtub with our revolutionary full body float duo the head floater and body floater luxury bath pillows. I mean, they really make a lot of promises here and I'm excited to check them out.

Kate: I hope you're not disappointed.

Doree: Also they, they are based in Malibu. So it came very quickly.

Kate: Ooh.

Doree: Which is always fun for me here in Los Angeles to get something very quickly. Now, if I haven't been clear enough, this is not an ad. They do not sponsor this podcast. They did not send me this product. I purchased this because I was targeted.

Kate: They came after you.

Doree: They came from me. And now that I've bought something from them, I cannot, escape their ads.

Kate: That's the worst. You can't shake them.

Doree: And no. So, I mean, look, I just they'll be with me forever. All right. I will report back on how this goes.

Kate: Float on. Float on, Doree.

Doree: Oh, I should play the Modest Bouse song as I bath.

Kate: As you bathe. On repeat.

Doree: We're gonna take, we're gonna take a break.

Doree: Hello, everyone. We have returned and we bring you a voicemail.

Kate: We do.

Voicemail: Hi. Um, I'm just calling cause I did this very ridiculous project while I was avoiding work tasks from home. And I made an inventory of all of the things in my house. It started out with groceries and then it became like makeup products and cleaning products. And I went a little bit crazy. Um, while I was doing it, but I have really enjoyed it. And it saved me from buying a new, um, eyebrow gel. And it has itemized everything in my whole house. It's wild. I just did it like a week ago. So who knows how it'll go? But I was just really curious if anybody else does anything like this or if anyone has a, any good systems for it or if y'all have ever tried anything like this. Um, love y'all so much. Thank you. Bye.

Doree: Wait a second.

Kate: I know.

Doree: Wait a second.

Kate: They inventoried their whole house.

Doree: Like every single item that they own.

Kate: I tell you, I looked around my kitchen as I was listening to this and I was like, God, speed.

Doree: I mean, this would take me years.

Kate: Well, you know, I, I worked have worked in retail a lot and we would inventory the store and we would do it in like the middle of the night. Like it, it like had to be done before the store opened the next there's like all these weird rules. So you'd be up all night counting jackets, you know, like it was, it was mind numbing and so stressful. So to do that in your home, I just, I am in awe of this listener.

Doree: Me too. I'm gonna need to know more.

Kate: Yeah. I could see doing like your bathroom.

Doree: Yeah. Actually like taking inventory of all of my like beauty and skincare products could be interesting and helpful.

Kate: or like disturbing.

Doree: or disturbing,

Kate: you know, you look in and you're like, oh, oh, I've got 30 deodorants. And I, I keep buying more deodorants. Yeah. Yeah. Well, does anyone else inventory their homes? This listener needs to know. They must know. And if you're out there, they wanna meet you.

Doree: Well, and I'm, I also personally am curious.

Kate: me too. I am too.

Doree: So just for our own sakes, please let us know.

Kate: Let us know.

Doree: Okay. Here is another voicemail on a different topic.

Voicemail: Hi, Kate and Doree. I've been a long time listener and I'm listening to episode 2 0 5 and Dori is talking about her meal planning. And I wanted to share what me and my mom and my sister and aunt do. So we each make a large meal on Sunday and we divide it into four portions. And then we swap it so that we have, we end up with four different dinners throughout the week that we just have to heat up. And they're already made, we've been doing this for like four months now. And it has been life changing. And I keep telling everybody, they should find a group of people to do this. The only thing is you have find someone who likes the same food as you and needs in terms of allergies and dietary needs. Just wanted to share my idea. Love your pocast. Bye!

Doree: You does it maybe, probably because of COVID, but there was a woman I knew who did this. And she would occasionally post on Instagram, like on Sunday night, her like the meal she was making. And like she and her friends had this swap going. And I always thought it was cool, but like also seemed daunting.

Kate: I think it seems so cool, but I have such anxiety about like people pleasing that I would be worried that everybody hated the thing I made. Every week I would be anxious.

Doree: That would stress me out. That would stress me out. And yeah, like what if one week you couldn't do it? Or, you know what I mean? Like I just, it would be, it might be too stressful, but it also does seem very cool.

Kate: It does.

Doree: Also, I'm also jealous that you live close enough to your aunt and your mom that you can do this with them.

Kate: I know. I, I, this made me feel kind of jealous too. I would- I wish I could do this with my family. My brothers are really good cook. I would just like, I feel like I would just make hot dogs and then I would just take whatever my brother makes and enjoy that.

Doree: Kate I have had your cooking and it's good.

Kate: I'm not a terrible chef. I can do it, but

Doree: So don't sell yourself short.

Kate: Okay. Okay. Okay. All right. Oh goodness. Okay.

Doree: Look, I'm just saying, all right,

Kate: Well, if you ever wanna do this story, let me know.

Doree: I will. I will.

Kate: I would consider it. It's such an intriguing idea. Although you we'd be cooking, I would have to be cooking for four.

Doree: Right? Right. I, so

Kate: It's a lot, it's a undertaking. But I, I feel like if you had a group of singles that's this could be very fun.

Doree: Yes. I agree with that. And then it's also nice because I feel like so many recipes are not intended for a single person. And so people end up with like a huge batch of like Turkey chili that they're never gonna make it through, but if they could divvy it up,

Kate: Totally.

Doree: That would be cool. I know people who have also done like specifically soup exchanges,

Kate: This is intriguing.

Doree: So I don't know. I feel like there's also, there's like ways to sort of tweak it to your specifications. You know what I mean? Maybe it's a pasta dish exchange. I don't know.

Kate: Oh, I would love to do I, I have this fantasy of doing a lasagna potluck where the only dish people can bring is a lasagna.

Doree: That would be really fun. I used to, I, I used to have friends in New York who annually would have a pie party.

Kate: Oh baby.

Doree: Everyone would bring a pie, I think. Did they do it on pie day? I don't think they did actually. Um, I feel like I once went to a soup party. Anyway.

Kate: Wow.

Doree: Listen, I, I wanna hear about other people's adventures in this arena. What

Kate: Are your food exchanges? I know like cookie exchanges are my, my mother-in-law does a big cookie exchange with her book club every year.

Doree: But that feels like a once a year sort of holiday.

Kate: Yes. Yes.

Doree: Time thing. I'm intrigued by this like regular, weekly.

Kate: I am too

Doree: Meal exchange. It also, like, it also seems very like community minded. And I like that aspect of it. I also feel like it probably cuts down on food waste. I like this, everything about this.

Kate: We like this.

Doree: Literally. I like everything about this. So listener kudos. All right. We have a text.

Text: Hi, dumb question that I constantly think about when people say that they wash their hair once a week, for example, do they mean they only use shampoo and conditioner once a week or literally get their hair wet and clean it once a week? Does it matter how often we get our hair wet?

Doree: Kate? I've had the same question.

Kate: This is so interesting because I've also had the same question. It's my, I always assumed that when people say they wash their hair once a week, they don't wet it. Like you set it and forget it. And you're keeping whatever style, you know? I mean, obviously everybody has different hair, different texture, different needs, but I've always assumed that you keep the hair dry and you're just washing your body.

Doree: Yes, I have that assumption too. But then I did go through a phase where I was showering more frequently than I was washing my hair. And I would often just wash my hair. Mm. Like wet my hair. I mean, with no shampoo or anything.

Kate: Ah, that's interesting. I, I am now just back to always shampooing when I take a shower.

Doree: Me too, because I'm not showering every day.

Kate: Oh, nor am I. Why do you think I had to take a super scrubbing shower the other day? Because it was like a week's worth of film on my body.

Doree: Also. Can I just say the air in Los Angeles has been so dry lately?

Kate: Yes. You can say it.

Doree: Like my skin is really dry. My lips are really dry. I'm feeling dehydrated. It's been really intense.

Kate: I'm having the same issue.

Doree: Just want to put that out there. Um, alright. Okay. Should we take another little break?

Kate: Yeah. When we come back, we are gonna be hearing from more listeners about the other listener whose husband didn't like their short pixie cut.

Doree: Okay. We'll be right back.

Kate: BRB.

Kate: Okay. So we got a couple more messages I wanted to share. Um, with really interesting alternating points of view. One person wrote.

Text: also had another thought about this most recent episode. I'm thinking we are being a little hard on the guy who potentially isn't into his wife's short hair. I agree. They need to talk about it. But what if it's true that he isn't into short hair? I think it's harsh to just say he needs to get over it. What if it were the other way around? And the guy had a beard or something that gave him a lift of confidence, but was a real turn off to his partner. Would she just have to get over it? I'm just not sure how you get over something like that. Just food for thought. But obviously these two need to talk.

Doree: Okay. This is so interesting because I actually felt like we were like very nice to the guy.

Kate: Yeah. I, I kind of just think you get over it. Like sometimes my husband has a beard and sometimes he doesn't And I don't care.

Doree: Yeah. And like, I believe we said that, you know, there was space for him to not be attracted to her with short hair. Like that is a thing. So I disagree with this listener.

Kate: I, I also think like, and I think the next listener kind of addresses this, but I think we get into a slippery slope when partners start having a say over how another, their partners appearance is

Doree: Great point.

Kate: Um, that is often controlling behavior. So, um, I just, I do feel like, you know, we have body autonomy and one would assume you could still be attracted to your partner if they change a physical aspect of their appearance,

Kate: But maybe not everybody. And maybe that's a thing we need to. Okay, well, listen, do you wanna take this next text?

Doree: I would love to. Okay. You are so on point. See, I love when listeners say that. We're so on point

Kate: That's just validating what you thought here. Doree.

Text: When it comes to the listener who called a getting a pixie cut and thanks. Her husband. Doesn't like it first to him. Second, you need to find what works for you and let him know how it makes you feel. My husband, after 15 years told me, he likes me with longer hair, um, news to me. But when we talked about it, I said, that's great, but I feel more beautiful and confident at shoulder length. It's easier to manage and dry. And I really love it. And he was okay. In the end, we had an open conversation and sometimes when it comes to my body, I tell him I'm happy to discuss it, but I'm not asking for permission.

Doree: Yeah.

Text: I'm telling you what makes me feel good? And that is for all decisions regarding my body.

Doree: Ooh, yes. Sorry. I just like yelled that, but like, I really like what this listener is saying.

Kate: Yes.

Doree: I just wanna go on record.

Kate: I love it. I think this is a great point. Mmm. Mmm. Mmm. I mean, what a hot topic. I never, we never have discussed this before, so I'm, I'm intrigued to hear what more people think and we appreciate all opinions

Doree: We do.

Kate: But Doree appreciates the ones that agree with us more. I'm kidding. I'm teasing you.

Doree: Oh Gosh.

Kate: Okay. Well, listen, I, you know, I had dropped a little activity of the week in here to suggest that people scrub themselves inspired by my own experience. But I also feel like just taking a good old fashioned bath along with Doree might be a nice way to go too.

Doree: Come into the bath with me.

Kate: Well, hello.

Doree: I mean, that's weird, but you know what I mean?

Kate: Float with Doree.

Doree: Float with me. Come on. This bathing journey. Doree's bath. It's a thing.

Kate: Can't wait to hear what happens. I hope you don't like flip over. Like I don't what's I can't wait just a see, I don't know, like, what are these tools gonna do? And are they big and bulky? Like, do they look like foam rollers?

Doree: I have not inflated them yet.

Kate: So you blow them up.

Doree: You blow them up. Yes. And you can, you can inflate them as much or as little as you want.

Kate: So I mean, someone, one review here said life changing. I had a bad back and the neck and leg pillow perfectly allowed me to float in bliss with no pain.

Doree: I mean,

Kate: I cannot like, I honestly, tonight can't come soon enough. I'm like dying to know what this is like, please, please don't leave me hanging.

Doree: Oh, Kate I will probably be texting you from the bath.

Kate: I texts from the tub please. All right. Well, listen, I love making a pod. Sorry about eating chocolate earlier. I will keep my eating to when we're not recording, but you know, you all just make me feel so comfortable.

Doree: Kate. It's fine. I also, you know, I'm very sensitive to those things.

Kate: Well, I know, and I

Doree: I'm a little bit like the princess and the pea when it comes to like sound stuff, I think.

Kate: You have that thing. What's that thing called where it has a name where you're irritated by the sounds of like people chewing.

Doree: I don't have that. But I don't know. I can just, I feel like I just like pick up on like subtle sounds.

Kate: Well, and I'm always a nibbler and I'm always, I like to eat the second I sign on to do a podcast. I literally would sit down and make a podcast with like a plate of food. It's just bad timing on my part. I always am eating and muting myself. It's it's not the best you and Samee handle it very well. When I show up chomping away.

Doree: It is what it is. All right. Let everybody, this was the joy. We'll talk to you all again. Very soon.

Kate: Tootle-oot.

Doree: Bye.